Categories
Culture Health and Fitness Lifestyle People

The School Bells ringing with Heidi Gammon

The queen of agony aunts is back answering your returning to school questions

https://www.counselling-foryou.co.uk/about-us

Catch Heidi on Gateway radio: https://www.gateway978.com/?s=Heidi+gammon+

Dear Heidi,  

My son has always been effeminate and neither my husband or myself have tried to change that. When he wanted to not do football and take up sewing (and he is good) we fully encouraged him. Now he is 15 he wants to return to school this term as a girl, going from David to Danielle. Heidi can I be honest, I am terrified for him and his safety.  The school say it is ok but my husband is against it. We just feel he is too young still what can we do? 

Diana, Sheffield. 

https://mermaidsuk.org.uk/helpline-support-services/


Hi Diana,

Thanks so much for your question, I think it is great you have always seen David for who he wants to be and fully supported him.  As with everything that should not change, and your love and protection is the number one thing he counts on.

David has made what might be seen to many as brave decision to start to transition into Danielle, and it can be a confusing and frightening time for Danielle and for those that love her.  But it also can be liberating and a wonderful thing for those that feel they have been born into the wrong body.

First, get some help for the family and Danielle:  https://mermaidsuk.org.uk

Mermaids is a brilliant trans charity and will be help you all.  Equally counselling with a therapist should help https://www.onetherapy.london/transgender-counselling-london/

Please make sure you keep an open conversation with Danielle, so there are no secrets. If you feel the reaction at school to Danielle is hurting her, go to the school right away. It is so important not to react negatively as you have been doing but talk to her about safety and  life moving forward.

Here is hoping it all goes well 

Love Heidi 

Heidi hi, 

My mother is a super bitch and is all about how things look. I am 17 and going to college this year and as it is a boarding college it is brilliant as I can get away from her showing off. Heidi, she thinks she is coming to see me settle in. I know it sounds like I am being unfair but all that will happen is she will come and make the whole thing about herself,  flirt with people and it will be an embarrassment.  Honestly I do not want to go if she is coming.  

Brendan, Richmond upon Thames. 

Hi Brendan, 

The narcissist mum https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b00jm3ms

Oh, bless you,  I am sure she wants the best for you. Parents are only human too and as we grow older, we sometimes see flaws in them as in all humans. Equally it is a good idea to talk to your parents as humans. You are 17 now so maybe tell her you want to make the move in and settle in on your own. 

It may cause a row if she asks why to tell her you sometimes find her a little embarrassing.  It can go either way  but it may get mum thinking .

I feel as a parent myself you always want your child to be happy and safe, so it’s understandable that she wants to see where you are living. When you are ready, show her where you are residing and then possibly whisk her out for a mum and son lunch ! 

Good luck 🤞 

Love you Heidi and need your help,  

Having lost my virginity last year to an older boy at my school, it did not take long to realise that my preference is girls. Then in Brighton in June this gorgeous girl came on to me and that was that.  

It was only a week in when I found out she is starting work at my college this term. Now I am 18 so not jailbait, but she said it would be an issue . What do I do when I see her? I am in love. 

Kim, Worthing. 

Hi Kim,

Oh, my love I feel your pain. If she says she cannot be in a relationship, there may be strict rules against this. I think she sounds sensible and will have checked.

It is a very new relationship and if it is true love maybe in three years’ time when you leave it can be rekindled. 

But please do not be holding a torch for the whole time. My thoughts are she would be more impressed if you went on with your life, met new people and grow as a person. 

Best of luck. 

Hi Heidi. 

My boyfriend is super-hot, he plays rugby and is a Queen’s dream. The only issue is when we go out everyone flirts with him and I am invisible. The main problem is he flirts back and tells me it is just fun, that I am to get over myself and that I am his man.  But I dread going out socially, especially to gay bars.  We have been together for two years; I am a teacher and he is a doctor.  I do not want to say anything in case I sound jealous or drive him away.  

Paul,  Battersea.

Hi Paul, 

This might sound crazy, but many beautiful looking people have issues finding love and making people feel secure in a relationship with them. 

It feels like you’re being insecure and I feel for you. Sit him down tell him you’re feeling insecure and you need some reassurances. Even get some couples counselling.

Best of luck 

Steven Smith.'s avatar

By Steven Smith.

Steven Smith was born in Coatbridge in Scotland. He was brought up in Whitley Bay, before briefly moving to London. He then moved to the seaside town of Brighton, where he was first receiver recognition for his hairdressing skills. Steven moved to America for eight years, working in Beverly Hills, and on his return to London in the late 90s, rose to fame working in fashionable Knightsbridge. He has styled model Katie Price, actress Denise Welch, David Hasselhoff and the cast of Baywatch. Steven had his own column in The Sun newspaper advising on hair and beauty, and was a regular on the Lorraine Kelly show, transforming GMTV viewers into their favourite stars. He made over Lorraine herself, transforming her into movie legend, Elizabeth Taylor.

Steven has been a freelance writer for the last ten years, combining showbiz interviews and travel with his eye for styling. He has written two books: Powder Boy, looking at the dark side of showbiz, and an autobiography: It shouldn't happen to a hairdresser, offering a witty and sad look at his life. He is currently penning a third book to be titled Happy in Chennai.

He has a monthly column, Tales of a single middle-aged gay man that looks at not only the light side of gay life, but also darker aspects such as rape, addiction, and chem-sex. Steven also runs his own beauty/aesthetic blog and is a patron of Anna Kennedy online; a charity that not only supports the autism community but educates the public about those that live with autism.

Leave a comment