Spoiling It for the Others

Why “Dead Life” Will Seriously Affect Us All

We are living in an era where serious fraud is celebrated, and the tale of The Emperor’s New Clothes feels more like reality than fiction. If you dare to point out the truth—that the emperor is, in fact, naked—you might find yourself in court. It’s an utterly unhinged world we live in.

I am at a lovely lunch in the heart of Essex, a place synonymous with spray tans, hair extensions, Botox, and outrageously long lashes. To say the least, I fit right in. My gorgeous companion has abandoned extensions yet looks stunning, appearing even fresher and more youthful than the rest. She is what I would call real. When she did go the false route, she never told tall tales or passed them off as her own. She is genuine—in fact, we once joked about the extensions needing food parcels. If she had lied, I wouldn’t trust her.

So, when I recently noticed a trans woman using what I find to be the most troubling and manipulative card of all—the “Dead Life” card—I was deeply concerned. And now, everyone is expected to either accept her version of events or face being sued. This isn’t a joke—it’s a serious issue.

For those unaware, the “Dead Life” concept allows individuals who have transitioned to rewrite their past. Not only can they change their pronouns (I am totally with)  but in some cases, they can craft entire fictional histories for themselves—transforming their previous existence into something entirely unrecognisable. A bit like The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe, where a whole new world is created from imagination.

Now, let me be absolutely clear: I have had the privilege of knowing many incredible, talented, and brave trans women. They have undergone their journeys to become their authentic selves, and in my eyes, they are now—rightfully—women. Interestingly, none of them have resorted to the “Dead Life” tactic. Instead, they have spoken openly about their lives, their struggles, and their triumphs, offering guidance and inspiration to others. One such example is the incredibly lovely India Willoughby, newsreader and presenter.

However, let’s consider a different scenario. Suppose I told you that, at 16, I was an astronaut and had a torrid affair with Madonna. That would be an outright lie (all but  an amusing one). At 16, I was, like many others, just a regular teenager experiencing life. But here’s the difference: if I were to publish a book claiming such fabrications as fact, people would rightfully call it out as nonsense.

So why is it that a trans woman can write a memoir claiming that, at 17, she was a stunning young woman having an affair with a well-known pop star (now deceased)—when, in reality, at that time, she was a 17-year-old boy with acne? The claim that she auditioned for a well-known girl band when she would have needed a good shave for that is also questionable. But what’s really worrying is the superimposition of pictures of herself as a girl into family photos when, in fact, she was a boy.

How can publishers allow this and sell it to an unsuspecting public? It is deceitful. Should we sue?

Even newspapers are reporting such blatant fabrications as truth. It makes Trump’s propaganda look like child’s play. As a community are we not all up in arms about his lies ? 

Lies are not facts. Yet, we live in a time where, if The Emperor’s New Clothes were rewritten today, the boy who dared to shout, “He’s naked!” would be the one dragged into court. It’s insanity. Serious fraud is being rewarded, and if you speak out against it, you are painted as the villain.

Now, I am sure that many trans women who invoke the “Dead Life” narrative are simply living their lives quietly and not publishing books filled with fabricated stories. But as a community, we are in danger.

On 5 March, Legendary Children (All Of Them Queer) screened for the first time in London to a sold-out crowd. The screening marked the end of LGBT+ History Month and was followed by a Q&A with human rights campaigner, Peter Tatchell, who said he hopes the film inspires others towards activism.

Peter Tatchell made an incredibly insightful point. He doesn’t just work within LGBTQ+ charities; he also volunteers in a range of organizations, including those within religious communities that have historically been homophobic. By leading through example—by showing up, engaging, and being part of these spaces—he changes minds. That is real activism.

Many trans people do not wish to be part of the LGBTQ+ community, and that is their choice. However, for now, they remain within it. They are welcome. But honesty must remain at the core of any community. Without honesty, we lose trust, and once trust is broken, everything begins to crumble.

When a con artist exploits the “Dead Life” card to fabricate a fictional past and present it as fact, we all suffer. We need to hold individuals accountable. My hope is that someone exposes this person for who they truly are—so that they may serve as an example to others not to go down the same route,

Because, at the end of the day, she is spoiling it for the others.

The incredible Boy George and 2hades favourite David Hoyle a star .