Steven Smith was born in Coatbridge in Scotland. He was brought up in Whitley Bay, before briefly moving to London. He then moved to the seaside town of Brighton, where he was first receiver recognition for his hairdressing skills. Steven moved to America for eight years, working in Beverly Hills, and on his return to London in the late 90s, rose to fame working in fashionable Knightsbridge. He has styled model Katie Price, actress Denise Welch, David Hasselhoff and the cast of Baywatch. Steven had his own column in The Sun newspaper advising on hair and beauty, and was a regular on the Lorraine Kelly show, transforming GMTV viewers into their favourite stars. He made over Lorraine herself, transforming her into movie legend, Elizabeth Taylor.
Steven has been a freelance writer for the last ten years, combining showbiz interviews and travel with his eye for styling. He has written two books: Powder Boy, looking at the dark side of showbiz, and an autobiography: It shouldn't happen to a hairdresser, offering a witty and sad look at his life. He is currently penning a third book to be titled Happy in Chennai.
He has a monthly column, Tales of a single middle-aged gay man that looks at not only the light side of gay life, but also darker aspects such as rape, addiction, and chem-sex. Steven also runs his own beauty/aesthetic blog and is a patron of Anna Kennedy online; a charity that not only supports the autism community but educates the public about those that live with autism.
It would be his birthday today and he is a legend that lives on in all our hearts
It was the prefect time for my tribute to him to be shared again
Read time: 6 minute, 35 seconds
On the afternoon of 20th October 2021, the cold northern air is blasting down on a huge group of brightly dressed people. They are, for the most part, patiently queueing.
They are also a very eclectic group. It would be hard to pinpoint a common denominator other than a certain eccentricity: the Queen of the New Romantics, Eve Ferret, her red beehive rising above the group, shivers and laughs with some men who look like they have come straight from the Conservative Golf Club and might never have heard of “The Blitz”, let alone donned black eyeliner at any point in their lives. Bright young people move in and out of the group. Many others, who are elderly, laugh together, and the atmosphere is electric.
A strong, male, northern voice pipes up.
“Bloody hell man, what are they playing at? Are they trying to boost profits? We’re all going to die of bloody cold standing out here!”
Tim Healy, Denise Welch, Matt Healy, Debbie Dedes, Olivia, Alex, Wills, Louise Healy, Lincoln Townley.
There is irony there, as the group, including me, are all standing at Mountsett Crematorium in Dipton, and it is just the kind of comment the man the group are there to honour would have made. The man I would describe as “The King and Queen of Everything”, Vin Welch: husband, father, grandfather, actor, drag queen, charity worker and friend to so many.
Indeed, the group mirrored his diverse lifestyle.
As the hearse drove up, holding its pink, glittery coffin, you knew that his daughters Debbie Dedes and Denise Welch were determined that the day would reflect their dad’s life. A celebration, and a right royal knees-up after, full of glamour, glitz and love.
It seemed like only yesterday I had popped over to see my friend, journalist Lester Middlehurst, at his home in Kemptown, Brighton. His bright, bubbly cousin, Rose Hirst, was staying, as was her stunning blonde friend, Denise Welch. They were appearing in Gaslight at the Nightingale Theatre.
Denise was playing the part made famous by Ingrid Bergman – Paula Alquist Anton. Rose was playing the maid. Denise was from one of the towns where I grew up, Whitley Bay, and I fell for her at first sight. She had a great sense of humour and was a Gemini, like me. But this is not about Rose or Denise. It was not long, anyway, before Denise introduced me to her parents.
Joan Collins
Her glamorous mum Annie, a psychiatric nurse, had an air of the Joan Collins about her. She also had her daughter’s down-to-earth sense of humour. The life and soul of the party, meanwhile, her dad Vin was dashing, and a walking one-man show. Back in the 1980s, the word “gay” was still taboo in many households. Much as my parents knew I was gay and accepted it, they would still cringe if asked what it was like to have a gay son.
In the Welch house, it seemed to be actively encouraged.
“What’s the problem? I’d love to have a gay son,” Vin said to me, quite quickly, upon meeting me. Denise was brought up in a household that preached diversity long before it was a buzzword. Everyone was treated with the same respect.
Gay people were just the norm for Denise and Debbie, growing up. Of course, their dad popping a frock on and coming out as his alter ego, Raquel, was also quite common. (He performed “Raquel” for many North-East charity events.) Denise adored this, although Debbie felt less enthusiastic about Raquel’s presence.
Denise Welch and “Raquel”.
In fact, the tale of Debbie working as a beautician on the cruise liners, and her parents joining her, is legendary. Debbie had asked her dad to be discreet. But of course, at the Captain’s
Ball, Vin was the life and soul of the party, as always. Everyone was loving him. Suddenly, he disappeared. After a while, Debbie went in search of him. Walking along the ship’s corridors, she was finally confronted by a glitzy, glamorous Shirley Bassey lookalike. It was her dad. It was a shock to her when, later that night, he was named both King and Queen of the evening.
The idea of one of your friends’ parents coming to a party would normally not be idyllic. With Vin and Annie Welch, however, they were the party, and Vin was always last to leave. I remember Denise telling me it had its downside. On her sixteenth birthday, her friends were keener to hang out with her mum (in her beaded catsuit) and her fabulous dad.
But Vin was more than a party man. He was a charity worker and friend to so many, and
he possessed rare qualities. You could trust him, and he was loyal to you. His often sarcastic humour could have you in stitches. Vin loved to gossip; I would tease him: “You’re worse than a queen.” But if you wanted to tell him a secret, he would keep it.
Vin would often come and stay with me after Annie passed. He loved her dearly.
Walking along Old Compton Street one night, he shed a tear and said, “There will never be another woman for me like my Annie.” He often hid his sensitive side with humour, but those that knew him saw he had a heart of gold.
Pink suit.
Vin loved life and the ladies, and the women loved the sparkling, pink-suited man.
One of the last times he came to stay was especially memorable. He truly kept up with me (and more) when it came to going out. As we were seated in a bar, waiting to see his friend, the cabaret star Eve Ferret, a very attractive woman approached me, sat on my lap and proceeded to kiss me. She pulled back in horror after realising her mistake.
Vin asked, “How do you know her?”
I explained that I didn’t, and he replied, “Bloody hell, man, I wish I had sat in your chair.”
After the show, Vin stayed on, and he finally got in at 2 am, having popped down to Stringfellows, where he was an honorary member.
Yet he was up by 10am the next day, having his usual breakfast – a “Cup a Soup” (mushroom) and an orange. He was suited and booted by lunchtime, and off to see “Man of La Mancha” starring Kelsey Grammar and the incredible Cassidy Janson, who shared the same agent as his daughter Denise Welch.
We were invited backstage to meet Cassidy when her parents were there. Vin charmed everyone. When Kelsey popped in, however, Vin turned to him and commented,
“I thought you were great. Don’t listen to what all those critics say.”
Kelsey was left opened mouthed, and I was trying hard to hold back the tears of laugher.
You would think that would be enough for any stay, but we were off to see one of his grandsons the following night: Matt Healy, lead singer of The 1975. He was incredibly proud of all his family. His other grandchildren came too – Olivia, Alex, Wills and Louis – although taking Vin to Wagamama’s before the concert was not a great idea. “Worse meal of my life”, Vin told me upon leaving An hour into the electric show, there was Vin, bopping away with three or four girls and loving life.
That was Vin. He loved life. As Denise Welch said, “He knew how to live life, and he knew how to die.”
There will only ever be one Vin Welch, but boy, were we all so lucky to have had him in our lives.
Dr. Anna Kennedy shares with Steven Smith her life and treasured memories of the late Robin Windsor
From reigniting her passion for dance to becoming a dedicated supporter of her charity, Anna Kennedy Online, Robin’s influence was felt deeply in both her personal and professional life.
His joy, warmth, and unwavering encouragement left a lasting mark not only on Anna but also on everyone involved in Autism’s Got Talent. Robin’s humour, empathy, and dedication to helping others shine through in every story she tells, highlighting the strength and joy of their friendship.
A beautiful time with Anna’s great friend the late Robin Windsor .
The tribute Anna attended for Robin felt like a heartfelt celebration of his life and spirit. A small white feather, spotted floating throughout the event, felt like a sign that he was right there, celebrating alongside them.
While she mostly dances at home now, Anna cherishes the memories of performing their Charleston together, a dance that remains close to her heart.
Thank you, Dr. Kennedy, for sharing these beautiful memories—a fitting tribute to Robin’s legacy and the lasting friendship you shared.
1. How did you first meet Robin? I first met Robin in December 2014 when I was chosen as one of six participants for The People’s Strictly for Comic Relief out of 11,000 entries.
2. How did he change your life? Robin reignited my love of dance and reminded me how it makes me feel—free, joyful, and alive. He showed me it was okay to take time out for myself and have fun, even amidst my work with the charity and my responsibilities to my boys.
3. Where were you when you heard of his passing, and how did it affect you? I saw it pop up on social media and thought it was one of those awful hoaxes. But then the reality hit, and I felt completely numb, like my heart dropped. I cried while driving Angelo to college. It was a deep, wrenching sadness.
4. Robin was very involved with your charity, Anna Kennedy Online. In what ways did he help? When I told Robin about AnnaKennedyOnline and our work, he was immediately interested. He came to Autism’s Got Talent, where we danced our Charleston together at the end, bringing all the performers on stage with us for a standing ovation. He was deeply moved by our performers, often teary-eyed. Robin supported Autism Dance Day as well, even donating dance lessons for us to auction off.
5. You did a tribute to him at Autism’s Got Talent? Yes, Robin was an integral part of our show, presenting some of our performers and participating in a magician’s act. He usually sat front row beside me, and his absence was deeply felt. I recently attended The Last Act, a show celebrating Robin’s life at the Theatre Royal Drury Lane. The event was filled with his friends performing in his honor. Anton Du Beke called Robin “the human glitter ball,” which was so fitting. I thought I saw a small white feather floating during the show, as if he were celebrating with us.
Lisa Riley at last night tribute in London at the Theatre Royal
6. Do you still dance now? I mostly dance at home. But when Robin was on tour, I joined him at seven venues near me, where we performed the Charleston together.
7. You’ve always been surrounded by friends from the LGBTQ+ community without making it a big deal. How do you view that? Why should I make an issue about it? They’re simply my friends, and I treasure their company.
8.Does Robin’s passing make you worry for any close friends? I hope that they know they can talk to me or reach out to mental health charities like SANE if they’re struggling. There should be no stigma about seeking help, especially in today’s uncertain world.
9. Did Robin ever talk about struggles with his mental health? Robin was always upbeat, helping others without hesitation. But he did share struggles “between the lines.” He had a way of carrying his burdens quietly, which makes it even more important to honour his memory by promoting mental health awareness.
10. What one memory of Robin sums him up? One that always makes me smile is our first meeting when I learned he was my dance partner. He flung his arms wide, wearing a feather boa, a smart suit, and an enormous smile, saying, “Hello darling!” Another cherished memory was when we received 4 x 10s for our Charleston. We were absolutely bouncing off the walls. He said, “My first 4 x 10s, and it was with you, Anna!”
2Shades meets husband and husband team Tiano. The London cabaret duo of Christopher Hamilton and Shimi Goodman
It is an almost unthinkable scenario that Liberace and Pavarotti had secret love children, let alone that those children went on to inherit their fathers’ talents!
Described in one five star review
Then they met one another, fell deeply in love and married. Well, you would be forgiven for thinking just that, as married couple Chris Hamilton (Piano) and Shimi Goodman (Tenor) take to the stage to perform to a sell-out audience of dedicated fans
2Shades wanted to know more about the boys and we fired some questions at them.
What are you both doing for Christmas?
It’s all very glamorous! We will be performing on a six star luxury cruise ship called the Silver Muse sailing from Melbourne, Australia to Auckland, New Zealand. But before jetting off to the other side of the world we have our Christmas show at the Crazy Coqs in London which sold out pretty much minutes after we announced it during our last show there. We are so grateful to all the people who keep coming to our shows in London and elsewhere.
What four Christmas songs would you sing at a Christmas Concert and why?
Oh Holy Night – This song really fits our style of music as it is a classical song but has been covered by the likes of Mariah Carey, the Queen of Christmas. Shimi particularly enjoys singing it as it really taps into the classical genre which he loves.
All I Want for Christmas – Speaking of Miss Carey, this song is unavoidable during the festive period so although it’s done to death, it would be Scrooge like not to sing it.
All I Want for Christmas is for Someone to Cancel It – To counteract the Christmas schmaltz and to honour all grinches out there, Chris wrote this tongue in cheek, irreverent song himself. If you can’t make it to our Christmas show, you can hear this song on YouTube.
Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas – It’s such a bitter sweet moment when Judy Garland sings this beautiful song in the 1944 film Meet Me in St. Louis. It makes most people feel all warm and fuzzy inside.
When did you both know you loved each other?
We met at Guildford School of Acting in 2000 and it was something like love at first sight over a jacket potato in Cathy’s Cafe!
What is the most romantic gift you bought each other?
Shimi: Chris always wanted to go on the Orient Express. His birthday is in December and after a bit of research I discovered to my dismay that the train wasn’t active during the winter. I had to break it to him that it wouldn’t happen for a certain big birthday of his but then a few weeks before his birthday he saw an advert online saying that the Orient Express had started a winter journey. I quickly booked it and we travelled from Paris to Vienna overnight. The train was relatively empty and it was magical looking out of the window watching the snowy scenery whilst being treated like royalty! We had the pleasure of jamming with an amazing Italian jazz group until the early hours. Even the waiters started filming us! We stayed at the famous Sacher Wien hotel when we reached our final destination. We went to see an opera and walked around the Christmas markets. Very memorable.
Chris: I always knew how much Shimi loves the movie franchise Back to The Future or indeed anything to do with the 1980s, so for one of his birthdays following a tasting menu dinner (which I absolutely hate) at a brand new restaurant in Covent Garden I got us top tickets to the West End musical. He knew all the text by heart.
The festival of lights Hanukkah is a big holiday. How do you both celebrate that? Is there a song that jumps to mind?
Shimi: I love Hanukkah. We light the hanukkiah which is an eight stemmed candelabra. You light a candle for every day of the holiday and eat sufganiyot which are yummy jam doughnuts. My favourite song is Maoz Tzur or Rock of Ages as it is known in English.
When did you both last laugh together?
Every day. We have our own silly sense of humour and can find the humour in most situations.
What are your wishes for 2025?
There’s a lyric in one of our original songs which says: “Music can heal and make it a better day”. We truly believe that it can, so we wish for our music to reach more and more people around the world and to keep travelling and entertaining. We would love to perform in America. Chris did a series of cabarets in New York a while back so it would be good for Tiano to take the States by storm! We’re currently in talks to hopefully make this happen during the next couple of years.
Who would you most like to work with in the music industry?
Barbra Streisand and Shirley Bassey are two of our idols. It would be an absolute dream to perform with them. We also love a Welsh singer called Ellen Williams and would love to collaborate with her. One of our songs “It’s Not Goodbye” would be a beautiful duet for her and Shimi.
Who is the best cook?
Shimi does most of the cooking when we’re home. But Chris makes a mean chilli con carne named “the famous” because he only cooks it once a year but when he does people rave about it. Whether they’re raving about the dish or the fact he’s actually put an apron on is anyone’s guess….
Tell our readers what you can expect from a Tiano concert.
Every show we put on in London is different for a couple of reasons. Firstly, we owe it to our loyal supporters to present different music to keep each performance fresh. Secondly, it challenges us as artists to keep learning new material. For instance at Crazy Coqs in Piccadilly, London we’ve become known for presenting a ten minute medley at each show which is devoted to a decade (for example the 80’s), an artist (for instance Whitney Houston), or perhaps a movie musical (maybe Dirty Dancing which incidentally Shimi performed in in the West End). It’s always challenging arranging and rehearsing an intricate medley of songs with constant key changes and mood changes and then performing it for a live audience for the very first time without looking at lyrics or music. However, it’s so worthwhile because the audience has come to really appreciate this moment in the show. In the last two shows people loved singing along during our medley devoted to The Carpenters and at our most recent one, ABBA. We spend all that time on each ten minute set piece and only perform it once!
Chris is a multi award winning composer and lyricist so we always share music he has written which once again the audience usually loves. Chris recently released an album of his very mellow original piano pieces called Sempre Piano (you can listen to it on Spotify). It’s so gratifying to see an audience respond so favourably to these moments of calm when he shares one of these pieces during a show. Shimi has also co written a few songs with Chris, a couple of which are on their debut album Tiano which you can also hear on Spotify. They have become firm favourites with the audience.
We put so much thought into our programme with the hope of taking our audience on a real journey. You’ll laugh, cry, sing along and leave our show with a big smile on your face!
Glitz and glamour gathered in London on Thursday night for the launch of the coffee table photo book, BOLD.
BOLD features pictures of women who have lost their hair—80 percent of them due to treatment for breast cancer.
The venue for the launch, The House of Keune by Bloom Salon, was impossible to miss; it stood out like a beacon of light. A hair salon might seem like an unusual choice to launch a book about being bald, but as an ex-hairdresser, I can say it was the perfect place.
Ten years ago, I was featured in My Left Boob, the story of my dear friend, actress and socialite Sally Farmiloe-Neville, who I shaved her head, styled wigs, and helped grow her hair back.
The BOLD photo book is a powerful project that captures the beauty and resilience of women who have experienced hair loss due to breast cancer treatment, alopecia, or other conditions. The collaboration between the Pink Ribbon Foundation and Caroline Sikkenk Photography highlights the strength and femininity of these women through stunning portraits, offering a new perspective on beauty beyond hair.
Many of the women featured in the book were present at the launch, with their hair now grown back. The room was electric with love, laughter, and tears.
The photo book, with its high-quality presentation and 192 pages of artistic images, serves as a tribute to the courage of the women who participated. It’s also a meaningful way to support the Pink Ribbon Foundation, as all profits from the book’s sales go towards the charity’s efforts. Pre-orders are available now, offering a chance to own a piece of this empowering project while contributing to a vital cause.
The evening began with a chance to explore the BOLD exhibition, stylishly displayed around the salon’s shampoo area. It was an exciting atmosphere with celebrities such as Wendy Turner Webster (Pet Rescue), Dr. Anna Kennedy OBE, celebrity artist Piluca, and comedian Sarah Mulindwa joining the guests.
The real stars of the night were revealed as the guests sat down to listen to a panel headed by Lisa Allen and Dutch photographer Caroline Sikkenk. Models Lauren Plumb, Tricia Bailey, and Anais Muczynski, all from the iconic photo collection Bald and Beautiful, shared their stories of battling cancer with courage and great humor. The audience laughed, cried, and found inspiration in their stories. There was a standing ovation when Tricia shared her vocal talents and sang Sweet Caroline.
There wasn’t a dry eye in the house when a tribute was paid to one of the amazing models who is sadly no longer with us. Sally Franklin passed away after a recurrence of breast cancer, but her brave and supportive family was present to share their love and memories of this incredible woman.
Sally Franklin
Lisa hopes to take the panel and show to Scotland next, and we at 2 Shades salute her, her team, and the incredible women of BOLD.
It is my favourite time of year, and the incredible Autism’s Got Talent is back.
Since its inception by Dr. Anna Kennedy OBE in 2012, Autism’s Got Talent has evolved into a legendary showcase that shines a spotlight on the unique talents of individuals living with autism. This one-of-a-kind event has captivated audiences and received high-profile media attention for over a decade, setting itself apart from other talent shows by offering an evening filled with surprises, inspiration, and diverse performances. Hosted at the renowned Mermaid Theatre in Blackfriars, the 2024 edition promises to be another unforgettable celebration of talent and inclusion
Steven Smith chats to 2Shades columnist and founder of Anna Kennedy on line
Unlike conventional talent competitions, Autism’s Got Talent is dedicated to celebrating neurodiversity and empowering autistic individuals of all ages. The show features a star-studded lineup of performers, including singers, dancers, actors, musicians, poets, magicians, and more. These gifted artists not only entertain but also challenge perceptions and break down barriers, demonstrating what people with autism can achieve. This event serves as a platform to replace stereotypes with messages of hope, fun, laughter, and inclusion, making it truly unique on the global stage.
This year proved to be a show-stopping extravaganza with over 17 acts.
The show was opened by Dr. Anna Kennedy as she introduced well-wishes from Loose Women star Denise Welch, Blue band icon Anthony Costa, EastEnders actress Kacey Ainsworth, and the legendary Carol Vorderman. Celebrities such as ‘Allo ‘Allo!’s Vicki Michelle, Pet Rescue author Wendy Turner, Taino’s Christopher Hamilton, and performer Tru Blue were among some of the showbiz names that turned out to introduce the evening’s performers.
Allo Allo Vicki Michelle and the inspirational Lisa Allen from Pink Ribbon foundation
Comperes for the evening were Gateway Radio DJ and Ambassador of the charity, Aston Avery, along with former The People’s Strictly contestant and amateur dramatic theatre enthusiast Phillip Barnett.
Christopher Hamilton
Pineapple Dance studio lead by teacher Maggie Paterson who have supported the event from the start team of 40 dancers
Gateways radio DJ Aston Avery one of the presenters of AGT “Autistic and Proud ”
This year’s acts, who travelled from far and wide, did not disappoint. It kicked off with Alba Pulido Brocklebank’s stunning rendition of Burn. There were so many outstanding acts this year, it is hard to highlight them all. From guitar supremo Caydian Evans, who described the experience as an amazing, unique opportunity, to father-and-son team Aaron and Andy Clark, who said, “This is a memory that will last a lifetime, and we are deeply grateful for the opportunity.”
Caydian Evans
Northern Ireland seemed to feature prominently this year with two singers: Andrew McMurdie, who said, “There were so many uniquely talented people in one room, like I have never seen before,” and Ty Williams, who brought the house down.
Somerset singer Lianne Vessier was blown away by the diversity of the event, and the standing ovation for her performance left us all in awe.
Lianne Vessier
Stepping in at the last minute was Swaran Hayer, who dazzled the audience with his calendar skills (even revealing Anna Kennedy’s age and date of birth!). His mum, Mandy, said, “It will forever be an unforgettable and memorable experience.”
Theatre group True Colours had the audience cheering as well.
True Colours
Anna Kennedy, founder of Anna Kennedy Online and Autism’s Got Talent, shares her hopes for the event: “We aim to continue to build Autism’s Got Talent year by year. We want all those involved to have fun, do what they love, make friends, be themselves, and have one night that is all about them.” This ethos of inclusion and empowerment continues to drive the event’s growth and inspire its participants.
Tears of joy marked the end of the show, with all the wonderful performers on stage, proud parents, families, and friends in the audience.
They all had one message for the AKO family: “You’re all amazing, and we all rock!”
With allegations of sexual abuse against pop stars, actors and high-profile business people at an all-time high, Steven Smith looks back at his own experiences as a 16-year-old on the celebrity party circuit in the late 70s. He asks whether society at the time was just as much to blame for the exploitation of teenagers as those that are having the finger pointed at them.
It’s a Monday morning. I’m at Soho Gym in Covent Garden and I’m working out. My book It Shouldn’t Happen to a Hairdresserhas been out for a month now. It’s my autobiography and follows my journey from coming out at 16 to tending to the hair of the rich and famous around the world. Though now I work mainly in the media, I still keep my scissors handy.
The book has caused quite a stir and there’s been a lot of press. Many are asking who the pop star was that seduced me when I was 16.
Wanna buy it? Link at the bottom of this article.
I decline to answer. It was not something I wanted to talk about further, plus, having worked for the tabloids for over a decade, I knew exactly where that conversation would lead. Having been harmlessly misquoted in some of the papers (one claimed that I hung out with Madonna), I still knew that interviews were a road that needed to be trodden carefully.
My phone goes. It’s a lady agent friend of mine who has been quite supportive in promoting the book.
“Hello darling. I simply couldn’t put the book down, it’s marvellous.”
She goes on to ask how the book is doing and who could imagine how difficult Katie Price could be. We both laugh, but then we get to the reason for the call.
“Darling, who was that awful pop star that seduced an innocent 16-year-old you?”
Innocent! Back in the late 70s, 16 was more like 20. Now, it’s not something that I felt was integral to my life and I won’t be naming him. But it was important to my story in the book. The gist of the call is she thinks that I should chat with one of her clients, a gorgeous police officer called Dan Neal. It could be beneficial to us both – he had read the book and was branching into showbiz.
My agent friend had always been good to me, so I agreed. Almost immediately, Dan called. He was involved with the Jimmy Saville inquiry and was making quite a name for himself (he later went on to marry Rylan Clark). Charming and full of life. He said how much he had enjoyed the book. But then came the cough!
“The pop star who seduced you when you were sixteen, would you name him?”
“No”, I replied quickly.
Dan asked if he could hazard a guess. Judging by the tennis courts in my description, was it —– ? I had heard that they were after this particular person, and funnily enough, I had met him. And a more asexual but charming person you could not want to meet. (Although rumours of his early years hold that he was rampant – but not with young men.)
“No, it was not.”
He went on about his duty to uncover these people.
Cutting Dan off, I pointed out that I was not about to be induced to join a witch hunt. There was a big difference between boys and girls who had been groomed (or been downright taken advantage of) and the youths who attended parties and venues dressed like they were in their twenties, who were desperate to bag a pop star or anyone in the limelight. Back in the 70s, 16-years-olds were very independent, with some passing themselves off as 20-something.
Many of them only seem to have decided they were taken advantage of after the star has died or when they’re in their late 50’s, when many (I’ve found, having done research) have money problems.
In the late 70s no-one asked for ID or carried it. We grew up in an era when, as soon as you could carry a bag of newspapers, you had a job as a paperboy. I was working at ten.
Benny Hill chasing a woman dressed as a schoolgirl around the garden and Barbara Windsor being sexually harassed dressed as a nurse in the “Carry On” films was acceptable in comedy, and for many in the UK (and the US) it still is.
Your correspondent 40 years ago.
When I was 16 the club to go to was BANGS! On Tottenham Court Road on Monday nights, Donna Summer blasted from the speakers and we dressed to impress. We danced on the stage as the beautiful, gay, stylish and soon-to-be famous mingled in an electric atmosphere.
There was a whole group of lads and lasses aged 15-16 who lived for Monday night. It was not unusual to be approached, asked to come to other parties or asked out.
A young air steward invited me to a party one night. It was being held the following Sunday and he said that a car would be sent for me. He wouldn’t tell me whose home it was but said it would be great fun. He was very cute, and Sundays were boring.
I slipped out on the Sunday from my parents’ home and picked up the car at the end of the road, where the steward was waiting with the driver. As we reached the destination, I was stunned by what I saw – it was the most magnificent house, more of a mansion really, with fake butler and maid statues to greet you in the huge entrance hall. It was like nothing I had ever seen before.
We parked the car around the back of the house and went to meet our host on the tennis court. I was shocked when I saw who he was – he had played with one of my favourite bands when I was growing up and here he was, greeting me on his tennis court! He was down to earth and seemed genuinely interested in me. Before long we ended up in his disco, where the cocktails flowed. And so did some other things. Some of the other guests offered me cocaine and laughed when I refused.
Not changed a bit
“Hey, have you brought a good kid to the party?” they asked.
Nevertheless, one too many gin and tonics and as Dorothy Parker said, I ended up under the host. Still, it was a great day, and I went home with my host’s autograph. That was enough excitement for me.
As he brought me home, the steward suggested I might like to meet other friends of his and intimated that it could be quite profitable for me. But I was streetwise beyond my 16 years and said no, thanks.
So, I was somewhat surprised when I received a call from the star’s right-hand man asking me to come down again, which I did. I found myself liking the guy, who even played a song for me on his piano, across from his statues of Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.
Really, I preferred T-Rex. He sent cars for me several times and we even watched a movie in his cinema room.
He only stopped sending for me after I told him that I’d mentioned the visits to my family. He almost passed out! After all, I was still only 16. This, despite me pointing out that I’d been in the theatre and it wouldn’t seem unusual that I was hanging out with the likes of him.
Still, much as his interest in me waned once he discovered that, he still invited me to the parties. They were great fun and he always got me home safely.
All these years later, though, whenever I smell Opium perfume, I think of him. The fragrance filled the bathrooms in his fabulous house and I even bought some for my mother that Christmas.
One of the most wonderful moments was when a famous pop manager held a boat party along the Thames for his birthday and Freddie Mercury and Kenny Everett were among the many celebrity guests. It was a dream come true and all I did was dance the afternoon away.
I was even hired briefly at the Embassy Club (in shorts).
With no age check.
Other parties were not so innocent. (Let’s not get started on the famous journalist with the three-way mirror whose parties hosted many a squaddie, some of whom went on to appear in the work of Mike Arlen (a gay photographer).
But I was lucky there was always an out. So, I never felt trapped or taken advantage of.
Of course, if I felt like playing victim I could rewrite this story in a different colour.
Many of the boys at the parties have passed on with HIV or disappeared. One or two I still bump into, and they talk of the good old times.
I’m sure that some may have regretted the follies of youth and even feel like they had been taken advantage of. But we can’t just blame the celebrities. The ’70s was a time that allowed freedom for the young and sexually promiscuous behaviour was rife.
Only when my nephew turned 16 I looked at his face. Suddenly it hit me how wrong the pop star and others were .
Luckily, we have ID now and people check. I feel great empathy with those that have been hurt. But regarding those who, in their teens, labelled themselves groupies, only to say many decades later they were victims, responsibility must lie with more than one party.
There is a difference between the casting couch, grooming – and dressing up, passing yourself off as older and consenting to things.
Steven Smith looks at the affect addiction has on us all, how it can be so prolific among the LGBTQ And celebrity community, the often-misguided views people have about those living with addiction, and of course shares his own tale.
November 26th, 2010, the phone rang with news I had been expecting—my lifelong friend Lester Middlehurst, the witty, Machiavellian, and brilliant journalist was dead at 55. He had been in coma for days after a suspected suicide attempt.
I know how I was supposed to feel to the world. But putting down the phone, there was complete numbness followed by anger, and then an overwhelming relief that the man who had formerly been my friend, but had in later years become my tormenter was no longer. No more waking to drunken abusive messages, or being the brunt of his jokes or outburst at parties, and I’d no longer have to apologise to other people for his behaviour towards them.
Lester in his prime
Lester Middlehurst was one of the first openly gay staff members at The Daily Mail. He was legendary. At the coroner’s inquest it turned out he had not killed himself, rather his death certificate said that he died of a hypoxic brain damage attack. Everyone agreed it was his addictive lifestyle that killed him.
Sadness
Lester was one the most addicted people that I have ever met, and he was my friend and I loved him. A month later I must have spent a day crying over him. The sadness was really that he never got help for his addiction, and you could say that my lack of knowledge of it prevented me from helping him…but that would be romanticising a terrible situation.
Back in 2009 I got him to agree to attend the Meadows Clinic in Arizona, but the next day he told me not to be so stupid. In truth, I did not feel strong enough to stand up to him. As my knowledge about addiction has grown, I have become more aware that there was nothing I could have done unless Lester had wanted to do anything about it.
According to the Centre of Addiction, members of the LGBTQ community are at greater risk of substance use and mental health issues compared to those identifying as heterosexual.
Members of the LGBTQ community face chronically high levels of stress, often due to having to suffer from social prejudice and discrimination. Fear, isolation, and depression increase the chances of self-medicating with alcohol and drugs. As a man that has lived a life in big cities, I have witnessed addiction in all classes and types of people. Addiction is a mistress that does not care who she dances with, yet the LGBTQ community are often her favourite partners.
As the self-confessed addict, actor Russell Brand explains that the distinction of any compulsive or addictive behaviour is when it begins to negatively impact on the rest of your life.
Compulsive
So, you might love chocolate so much that you’ll ignore all logical reasoning, “I have to have chocolate…I have to have chocolate…I don’t care what else happens”. If you’re crashing your car because of chocolate, that’s a problem.
According to Wikipedia, addiction is a brain disorder characterised by compulsive engagement in a rewarding stimulation despite adverse consequences.
Of course, addiction is certainly an illness and not a lifestyle choice, and if we are honest, addiction is in all of us in some way or another.
For me, I just can’t not buy a large French baguette, cut a few slices off, and put it back for later. I end up devouring the whole thing. Subsequently, I do not buy French baguettes unless I am feeling poorly. Whether it’s chocolate, coffee, or your favourite tipple, we all have cravings.
Russell Brand
Much as Russell Brand is right, there are so-called functioning addicts who you would not even realise are hooked on their drug of choice, and it can take many years for the effects to begin to show. Often referred to as “high functioning addicts” owing to their having powerful jobs or enough money to effectively hide their addiction from others. This knocks on the head the commonly presented image of an addict being down-and-out or living on the streets. According to the American Psychiatric Association, there is no such thing…they are all just addicts who have created coping mechanisms.
My father, God rest his soul, came home after holding down a high-powered job and drank whisky every day of his life, yet he would be horrified at the idea of being described as an addict. But when he left hospital after lung cancer removal surgery, he sat down and demanded, “Get me a whisky and a cigarette.” On the suggestion that was not a good idea and that he would end up back in hospital, he snapped “Are you threatening me?”
Growing up, I was told that an addict was someone who got up and drank first thing. Drinking after coming home from work and weekends was seen as normal for many in the 60s and through to the 90s. All of our soaps were featured around a pub, making alcohol look like a socially acceptable way of life.
I had a volatile relationship with my dad, but his fight with cancer gave me a better understanding of the nature of his addiction and where it had come from. He had been a talented jazz trumpeter and played with the BBC orchestra, but his nerves had come to the forefront and he started to self-medicate by having a few whiskies before his shows. Eventually, he gave up and started a family, but the drinking did not stop.
Charismatic
My father adored my best pal who also fights addiction, and is a truly remarkable human being who I was fortunate to love, and my dad did not like many people. The two were like two peas in a pod and talked for ages.
Spending time with my dad before he died made me wonder whether, if he had managed to overcome obvious anxiety and continued playing, perhaps he would have been happier. Of course, back then mental health was seen by many as a weakness and not to be spoken about.
My world has been filled with people who are addicts in one form or another. They are the most charismatic and amazing people and the arts are full of them. In my opinion, they all have one thing in common—they can snap and become almost frightening at the drop of a hat, and then suddenly they are wonderful and make you feel like you mean the world when they are OK. Sadly, during my childhood there was more of the former with my dad. Though I knew in the end that he loved me.
There are so many people living with addiction, anxiety, and mental health issues who are in denial. Even with all the help groups and open discussions there seems to be a quite a bit of stigma attached to it still.
Dr Pam Spurr, a popular self-help expert and radio television personality, says she often encounters people who are in denial about their issues that are the source of their addiction problems. They say things like “I just have a little problem with confidence” which ignores the fact that they drink excessively to help make them feel more confident. Or they say, “I only drink after work to take the edge off.” But when they count up the units, they are far in excess of government guidelines. It’s at times like these that I encourage them to think honestly about their drinking (or drug taking) and consider expert advice.
Many addicts get clean either by joining the 12-step programme, by checking into rehab, or by seeking counselling. The journey of recovery can be different and what works for one person might not work for another person. It is important to point out that as much as the newspapers show pictures of celebrities dashing off to glamorous-looking rehabs, getting into a state-run rehab in the UK can be very difficult for mere mortals.
While helping a friend who was using OxyContin (a pain killer) and had got into a mess from ordering online and then become addicted, the general health services did not want to know. Even going through other channels, she was advised that her chances of getting into rehab were slim, although she did come away from it with a strong network of friends around her.
A beautiful girlfriend of mine found her sobriety in a man as her anchor who was also living with addiction. They have both been clean for seven years now.
Living in LA, the 12 steppers (12 step programme) were like the mafia, and rumour had it that all the best movie deals were done at their meetings and also that many there did not have addiction issues and instead just wanted to pitch ideas.
There is no doubt that the 12-step programme helps many, and even if the meetings can become the new addiction it’s a healthy one.
I agree with Doctor Pam that it is amazing how much of a lack of understanding there is about addiction.
Cake
My gorgeous bubbly friend Monica is originally from California. She is a super bright academic having gone to Yale, lectured all over the world, and she also ran a school for a while.
Yet three years ago she decided to open an up-market catering company as her award-winning chef sister is a goddess in the business. People actually beg for invites to try her canapés.
Lunch with Monica is always fun—it starts off with “Darling shall we share a cake after?” Despite being gorgeous, she is always on some kind of diet. Her little addiction would be cake.
Like one or two other intellectuals I have met with qualifications coming out of every orifice, their life skills sometimes leave me speechless. Despite having a gay brother, she once commented on a photo shoot involving five men I had directed “Is the man with his foot up against the wall a sign he is gay?” I replied “No darling, there are no secret signs; it’s a James Dean inspired clothing shoot.” She just smiled and continued eating.
Today, however, she was on the warpath. She was catering for a big party we had worked on together to get celebrities at. One of the celebs had behaved inappropriately to some of the other guests and to a couple of waitresses.
She was not amused when I laughed, “Well darling, at least he did not get his cock out and try and pee in the champagne fountain like at my other friend’s launch. How that did not end up in the papers is beyond me.” I got the school ma’am look.
He was living with addiction – not surprising considering his childhood trauma and the abuse he lived with. He really should not have been drinking. I am not excusing him, but it’s not the end of the world that I did not invite him to the next few. I said that I’d have a word. Her eyes got wider, and she seemed shocked that I had empathy with the celebrity at all. She wanted him banned for life.
Taboo
As much as I have some reservations about the 12-step programme, saying you’re sorry to those you may have hurt is not easy to do, but it sometimes isn’t enough. I started talking about addiction, and a few minutes in it was clear that it was going nowhere, even though I was sharing this with someone highly intelligent.
Addiction remains a taboo subject. There are so many people in denial and as much as the newspapers are full of celebrity headlines about them being addicted, most of us don’t want to talk about it or feel labelled by it.
A year ago my phone rang—it was a friend who had come out of family day at a rehab centre that her daughter was attending. She was fuming that they suggested that it may run in the family, “They had better not be blaming this on me. I have no addiction.” She was not amused when I laughed “It’s not about you and I will remind you of that next time you refuse to come home from the bar or spend two weeks obsessing about something.”
Outside those who are counsellors, therapists, and those who talk openly about their addiction and some of their loved ones, I have found very few people who understand those living with addiction.
A very wise woman, author, presenter, and journalist, Jane Moore was one person who seemed to understand it. Lester and Jane were great friends and the two together were hysterical. Yet Lester had gone on a tirade about her and I was mortified since she was a true loyal friend to him, and he was starting to run out of friends due to his behaviour.
Lester Middlehurst and Jane Moore
While ringing her and offering full apologies asking her not to fall out with him, she calmly said, “I could never be offended by Lester. He is hurting too much, but he’s lucky to have a friend in you.”
At the time I just thought, but I wish if I had taken those words more to heart I might not have taken his behaviour personally and got as hurt as I did in the end. It helped later in life as I saw the pain addiction brings too.
The LGBTQ community have learnt to talk more as we have needed to be heard to survive. Most surveys say that a larger proportion of those identifying drug and alcohol use as a coping mechanism are LGBTQ, but I beg to differ.
I have sat in many restaurants and bars in London watching the city boys and their entourage go back and forth to the toilets, passing each other along the way. I am pretty sure they are not the kind found in the survey.
Addiction is a worldwide human crisis according to the World Drug Report. Unless we start talking about it, spotting the signs at an early age, and treating it as an illness, many will die with all the new and powerful drugs flooding the market. Whole towns have been wiped out in the US due to drug addiction.
Chemsex is the consumption of drugs to facilitate sexual activity. Both terms refer to a subculture of recreational drug users who engage in high-risk sexual activities under the influence of drugs within groups. Chemsex parties are said to be prolific on the London gay scene, but that is a different story. Not wanting to be righteous, I have no experience of it or want to engage in it. Recent reports in the gay press say chemsex parties are held across UK, but there is a correlation between addiction and sex shame.
The perfect storm
Sadly no longer with us David Stewart of 56 Dean Street, an award-winning HIV and sexual health clinic in the heart of London, explains that this trend is driven by a convergence of factors: “Vulnerable gay men with issues around sex, new drugs that tapped into that problem and changing technology. What they call the perfect storm.”
There was enough of a problem for the government to lay out guidelines in 2017.
Actress Danielle Westbrook, who I have interviewed many a time, put it simply to me, “Look Steve, you get ten people at a party and they all try coke for the first time. Four never try it again, four have it once in a blue moon, and two poor things are addicted six months later.”
The answer would be to never take the risk, but human nature is never that simple.
My friend Lester will never come back but it led me to have so much more of an understanding of addiction and how to protect myself around addiction. Many of the world’s beautiful people are soldiers fighting addiction every day of their lives.
This year’s presenter for “Autism’s Got Talent” Aston Avery chats to 2Shades
We were all thrilled to hear that one of the main presenters of “Autism’s Got talent” this year is going to be Aston Avery Gateway’s radio host and ambassador for Anna Kennedy on line.
Both Anna Kennedy and myself share a monthly spot with him on Gateway. He is for sure someone to be truly admired. He will bring an authenticity and sparkle to the show. I took time out to have chat with him before the big night.
Aston- Avery: A Journey of Passion, Perseverance, and Pride
How excited are you to be presenting Autism’s Got Talent?
I am really thrilled to be presenting this year’s Autism’s Got Talent. “It’s beyond exciting,” “I think it might surprise some people, seeing me in this role. But I’m looking forward to the challenge and seeing what I can improve on for the future.”
When did you first meet and get involved with Annakennedyonline?
My journey with Autism’s Got Talent began in 2015, when I first met Anna Kennedy while performing a bit of Elvis at the event. “That was the same year Anna did The People’s Strictly with Robin Windsor. Since then, I’ve been deeply involved with her charity, AnnaKennedyonline. In 2016, I was honored to become an ambassador for the charity, and I’ve had the privilege of performing at events like Wear It For Autism and various Autism’s Got Talent roadshows. Anna also helped me secure a scholarship with Pineapple Performing Arts, which was an incredible opportunity.”
At what age were you diagnosed with Autism ?
I was diagnosed with autism at the age of two and a half. My mum remembers it vividly. When they received the diagnosis, my dad had a tear running down his cheek. That’s why my mum’s book about our journey is called From A Tear to Here.
Astons as baby with his brother
You raise a lot of money for the cause?
You are right, I am no stranger to the world of fundraising and raising awareness for autism. It has seen me skydiving, playing in charity football matches, organising charity discos, and even hosting charity balls. it’s not just about the money. “It’s about raising acceptance within the community. That’s my real goal.
Aston Sky Diving
Being a previous act on Autism’s Got Talent, what advice would you give this years performers?
Having been a past performer at Autism’s Got Talent, my advice for this year’s participants is: Enjoy every moment. Make friends—talk to your fellow performers, and even reach out to past performers. It’s about connection as much as performance.
Who are your hero’s Aston?
My heroes are close to home: My parents and my brother. They’ve stood by me through everything—my autism diagnosis, my battle with enterocolitis, and even my fundraising efforts. They’ve been there for the good and the rough times.
Aston with his brother, Aaron
Your very vocal about bullying what is your advice to people being bullied ?
Being an advocate for anti-bullying, I feel strongly about speaking up about it. If you’re being bullied, don’t let them break you. Talk to someone—a parent, a sibling, a professional like a teacher or manager. You don’t have to go through it alone.
How did you get involved with Gateway 97.8?
My media journey began in 2013 when I got involved with Gateway 97.8, working behind the scenes on the technical side of things. By 2015, I was presenting his own daytime show. I’ve spoken to so many people—celebrities, regular contributors, and people from the local area. It’s been such a rewarding experience.
What are your future ambitions?
I’d love to perform in a pantomime one day, and I really hope to become a TV presenter. My dream is to appear on Strictly Come Dancing—that’s my favourite show. Fingers crossed!
What would you say gives you inspiration each day?
My daily inspiration comes from the people around me and my own drive. I wake up motivated to do what I love—whether it’s performing, presenting, or connecting with people to share experiences. I always say, my name is Aston-Martin Avery, I am autistic, and I am proud!
Why I am with Esther Rantzen when it comes to euthanasia being allowed in the UK
Inspirational Esther Rantzen and the incredible Martin Annand
News of the controversial suicide pod being used for the first time in Switzerland really caught my attention. The device allows the person in it to take their own life by pressing a button. The concern, even in Switzerland where euthanasia is legal, is that the pod functions without medical assistance.
It also triggered a memory of when I was asked to take a friend to Switzerland, and I nearly did…
It was a beautiful sunny day and my former partner, of twenty years and friend for twenty more Martin Annand and I were sitting in the leafy London Garden opposite where he lived.
He squeezed my hand and said,
“Steven, please take me to Switzerland, let’s arrange it today.”
The wonderful Martin Annand RIP 20th Of February 1944 – 9th of August 2021
We had been up most of the night. Martin had been in agony; he was terminally ill with cancer that had moved into the spine. He had sailed through hormone treatment and apart from the odd hiccup, chemotherapy had been giving us hope that a miracle would happen or at least extended his life, but we had had some bad news, and the chemotherapy had stopped working. He had moved on to radiotherapy and that was a whole new ball game. The illness was turning him quickly into a shell of himself.
Coming soon.
Helping was a battle as his new partner was unreasonable, a bully and often hysterical. I was up against people who were all “experts. A distant relative thought running a ball up and down his spine and getting him to exercise was good, but would not look at the actual fact that it was the worst thing you could do for cancer in the spine.
All through his illness I was absolutely determined to stay stoic and a rock, not the hysterical mess I was in private. Too often I have seen people make their friend or partner’s illness be about them, with the poor soul consoling them. Now his current partner had taken two weeks holiday and reluctantly left me to look after him. It was an ideal time to take Martin to Switzerland.
However, it was hard at this point to hold back the tears.
“Is that what you really want?” I asked him.
He had clearly done his homework and knew the price and exactly where to go. Pulling myself together and looking into his beautiful blue eyes I promised I would if he just gave it one more week. The doctors had said at the Royal Brompton that the night burns were quite a common side effect that should pass.
Holding him in the shower and as he lay shaking in bed, I would have done anything to ease his pain. Assurances that this phase would pass, and that the treatment would allow him more time encouraged us to push on.
To this day I am so sorry that I did not take him whilst he could still get on a plane. The horror that he endured no human being should go through. Why do we let a dog in distress die in dignity, yet our loves ones have to suffer? The religious right will tell you It is not God’s wish. Some God if he wants us to suffer.
“Suffer to come unto me “. Well, I cannot make sense of that. It is time to allow those with no hope of living without excruciating pain to die on their own terms.
By the second week it was too painful for Martin to travel in a taxi let alone fly. Then the current partner arrived back, and all was lost on the idea of euthanasia.
When there really is no hope, it is time to be kind and allow the terminally sick some release. Next time someone I love asks me, I’ll do it on the spot. I truly hope that if I were in that much pain with no chance of recovery that someone would do the same for me.
Me with Martin Annand a man who lived life to its full
If there is one thing that bemuses me it’s being put in a box because of my sexuality.
As a gay man I have heard it all over the years, including the presumption that I must be filled with excitement that Kylie is touring next year. No! I honestly would not cross the road to watch her, and I find “Padam Padam” one of the most irritating songs of all time.
Sure, she has a huge gay following. I remember two gay men jumping with excitement in the changing room of the gym exclaiming, “Oh my God we are seeing Kyle tonight, she’s such a survivor! ” And that was before the breast cancer. I have heard she is a lovely person, but she’s just not my taste in music.
Later at the Troubadour café the waiter enquired if me and my partner were going to see Kylie. After replying definitely not, he smiled and said, “Good to hear it, have a drink on me!”
Sure, I like Madonna; she is a true artist. Now Bowie, Lou Reed, Nina Simon or a night at the Royal Opera are my tastes in music.
What I am excited about is Oasis coming back. Liam Gallagher is brightly funny and a night out with him would be way up on my list rather than the gay Divas of music. Oasis marks an era, and a generation of people want to celebrate the band and re- live that experience for just for one night.
Their music is original, and they are a dying breed of rock star. The Manchester lads may not be the wild boys of the past, but every time Liam pops up on a show, he makes me laugh and he is by far a much better interview than most.
That’s what entertainment is all about. My friend Pam I know not to dare ring during the football or come to that rugby, cricket, darts season, tiddlywinks… If for a moment music, sport or something else can transport you to a happy place or bring a beautiful memory back to life for you, then whatever gives you that enjoyment is your business.
I, of course, respect everyone who can’t get Kylie “out of their head”, but come on, Liam and Noel are really something to get excited about.
Yes, it is that time of year again so please come see me and 2shades columnist Dr Anna Kennedy OBE on 12th October at the Mermaid theatre. Gateways Radio Aston Avery will be one of the main presenters introducing some incredible acts.
This star-studded spectacular show will showcase amazingly talented performances by adults and children with autism. The performers, which consist of singers, actors, musicians, magicians, poets and dance troupes, will fly the flag for autism and show what people with autism are capable of. Autism’s Got Talent provides a platform and fantastic opportunity to replace negative aspects with hope, fun, laughter and inclusion. This showcase is unique to any other project across the world.
Most of the acts have springboarded into exclusive opportunities. The audience feels a rare emotion of hope and belonging, part of a unique network, and understanding that anything is possible. Every year promises a showcase of a wide variety of performers. In previous years, there has been a stand-up performer, harpist, rapper, young author, acclaimed ballet dancer, opera singer.
Presenting this year Aston Avery Gateway radio host .
The concept of Autism’s Got Talent is based solely on inclusion, and there needs to be more, which is why we have started roadshows. Autism’s Got Talent is an annual event that grows in popularity each year and has firmly cemented its status as a leading charity and autism event.
Dr Anna Kennedy OBE and me .
Supported in the past by celebrities including Kacey Ainsworth, Richard Mylan, Dame Esther Rantzen, Carrie and David Grant, Debbie Moore OBE, the late Ian Royce, Dr Pam Spurr, Mitch Winehouse, Loose Women Star Denise Welch, Caprice, Luke Friend, Tony Discipline (BBC Eastenders), and Emma Noble.
I went to a Catholic school in the Northeast. Little did I know my husband Sean also was at the same school. Primary School were good and bad days for me and I enjoyed some lessons not all. Many of the nuns at the school were too strict and would not get away with caning across your knuckles or hand for talking too much!
If you happen to be late for school, you had to stand under the crucifix for 30 minutes at the end of the day and pray.
We were often also given many lines to write if no one owned up for example: A pupil threw a rubber at the Maths teacher whilst he was writing on the blackboard. I remember we had to write 100 times ‘Rubbers rub they do not fly!’
Dear Anna.
Please, I am at the end of the line with my 14 year old son. He was expelled last year for being disruptive in class. Now the school have written to me and said he cannot come back. James was diagnosed with Autism and attention disorder at 13. What can I do? Is there a right to appeal or should I find a school that is more suited to his needs? James is super bright and was in line to take exams
Many thanks Diana Waterford
Dear Diana,
Thank you for your email. You do have the right to challenge your son’s exclusion, and the school should have informed you of this process when the exclusion occurred. The following government guidance may be helpful, if your son attended a maintained school or an Academy:
If you believe your son was excluded due to a disability-related reason, you can separately make a claim of disability discrimination to the First-tier Tribunal before the school process concludes.
If the Tribunal rules in your favour, it can order actions that put your son in the position he would have been in if the discrimination hadn’t occurred, which could include reinstating him in the school.
Lastly, it’s important to ensure that all your son’s special educational needs are identified and met. If you haven’t done so already, you may want to apply for an Education, Health and Care (EHC) needs assessment.
This is the first step towards securing an EHC Plan (EHCP). The test for starting this assessment is whether your son may need a level of special educational provision that is only available through an EHCP. Given what you have said, this may possibly be the case.
Dear Anna,
Hello love the column. My daughter lives with Autism, and she is a great singer and just so loveable. My ex-husband won’t hear about it and said I am indulging her and encouraging her to be different. I am looking for a school that caters to her needs even its a private school or theatre My parents are happy to. pay. My ex is trying to block it and threatening to take me back to court if I remove her from her present school that I do not feel caters to her needs. What can I do?
All my best Stephany Wimbledon
Dear Stephany,
Thank you for reaching out and for your kind words about the column. I spoke to my husband Sean who supports the charity, and this is his area of expertise. It does sounds like you’re in a difficult situation.
My husband Sean shares:
Sean Kennedy
If your daughter has an Education, Health and Care Plan (EHCP), section 51 of the Children and Families Act 2014 gives you the right to challenge any part of the EHCP, including the school placement, even though a Tribunal if necessary.
This right cannot be interfered with by other courts. While your ex-husband is entitled to express his views to the Tribunal, he cannot prevent you from exercising this right. However, your daughter’s opinions will also carry weight, particularly depending on her age and if she has capacity.
It is certainly an unfortunate situation. If your ex-husband is threatening to take this matter to the Family Courts and your daughter does not currently have an EHCP, I would strongly advise seeking legal advice from a family law specialist.
We both wish you all the best in navigating this,
Best Wishes, Anna
Dear Anna,
I am a big fan of yours and have been living all my life with various issues, it was my 16th birthday last week my mum held a party and I am not real social so I found it embarrassing and in the end it was more about her. She even got drunk and went on and on about how proud she is of me- even with all my little ways. There was about five of my friends from school there with the rest of the mums. Anna I just want to leave home and get away from her. What should I tell her and is there any organisations that helps kids like me escape?
Blair Luton
Dear Blair,
Thank you for reaching out and Happy 16th Birthday. Have you spoken to your mum about how you feel? Is there a relative that you can confide in about how you are feeling?
Parenting an autistic teen can be challenging for parents, so it’s important to seek support from other parents, support groups, or professionals who specialise in autism.
Are there any local support groups near to where you live? Leaving home is a huge step and you need to be well prepared and safe as a vulnerable young person. I hope things improve for you very soon and your relationship with your mum also improves.
Sending best wishes, Anna
Has the interview selection for Colleges and Universities changes to aid those diagnosed on the autism spectrum?
Colleges and universities are required to comply with the Equality Act 2010. This means that if an individual with a statutory disability faces disadvantages during the interview process due to the effects of their disability, the institution must take reasonable steps to avoid these disadvantages.
For clarity, a statutory disability is defined in section 6, the Equality Act 2010. This section defines disability as a physical or mental impairment that has a substantial and long-term adverse effect on a person’s ability to perform normal day-to-day activities. To qualify, the impairment must significantly impact the individual’s ability to carry out activities that are considered normal for most people (including work and university study) and must have lasted, or be expected to last, at least 12 months.
It is important to note that conditions such as ADHD and ASD are not automatically classified as statutory disabilities, though they may be. The key consideration is how these conditions impact the individual. It follows that what are known as reasonable adjustments are specific to the individual. Importantly the university or college needs to be informed of any impairments before the section process.
While universities and colleges are not required to lower the competency levels expected of students, they must provide adjustments to the interview process where necessary.
There is a lot more to the Equality Act, but I trust this provides a useful overview and is, my husband has confirmed, is accurate.
2Shades Magazine 