What a night! It is truly an honour to be the patron of Anna Kennedy Online. The team has become like family, and with great excitement, I stepped out on Saturday for the annual Autism Hero Awards.
The Autism Hero Awards 2025: A Night of Celebration and Inspiration
Red Carpet Ready GBNEWS Nana Akua and fiancé Stephen Gillian .
On March 15, 2025, the prestigious Autism Hero Awards, hosted by Dr. Anna Kennedy OBE, took place at the Holiday Inn Regents Park, London. Organized by the charity Anna Kennedy Online, this highly anticipated event honoured the remarkable achievements of individuals, organisations, and initiatives making a positive impact in the autism community. With inspiring award categories, special performances, and celebrity guests, the night was a spectacular celebration of talent, resilience, and advocacy.
Anna Kennedy surrounded by glitz and glamour towering above her Actor Matthew Blake and entrepreneur Richard Andrews
A Star-Studded Guest List
The event welcomed an impressive lineup of celebrities, including bestselling author Samantha Lee Howe, actress Vicki Michelle, actor Gary Webster, television personality Wendy Turner Webster.
Tiano’s Christopher Hamilton with Anna Kennedy OBE
Heartstopper star Bradley Riches, presenter Nana Akua, and fiancé author Stephen Gillian. 70 years In the business Frazer Hines danced till midnight . Olympic champion and patron Joe Luck was on hand ,
Award winning author and screen writer Samantha Lee Howe who judged the awards along with me Steven Smith
Adding to the glamour was singing sensation Tiano’s Christopher Hamilton. Actress and presenter Danielle Mason, Pink Ribbons’ Lisa Allen, and artist Piluca Camino Alcon also graced the event. The evening’s main hosts, award-winning presenter Aston Avery and youth theatre organiser Phillip Barnett, ensured the night flowed seamlessly with warmth and professionalism.
Model actress and presenter Danielle Mason joined the celebrities and crowd .
The Autism Hero Awards is more than just an event—it is a movement that recognises the incredible contributions of individuals and organisations within the autism community. Each category highlights a different aspect of support, advocacy, or achievement, celebrating efforts both big and small.
A night to remember
Award Winners and Highly Commended Recipients
Young Person of the Year Award Winner: Lucy Lovett Highly Commended: Jiya Rai, Chapman Shum
Outstanding Community Award Winner: True Colours Theatre CIO Foundation Highly Commended: Craig Henderson, Doncaster Autism Service
Terry Scott is ready to do his thing as Aston Avery presents and Nana Akua and Anna Kennedy present and award to True Colours .
Sibling of the Year Award Winner: Brooke Scaysbrook-Smith Highly Commended: Kayden Francis, Rosie Simmons
Parent/Carer of the Year Award Winner: Nicole Simmons Highly Commended: Amanda Inglis, Satia Rai
veteran acting royalty Frazer Hines .
The Lifetime Award Winner: Elspeth Jones Highly Commended: Annie Sands, Joely Williams
Leading Business Award Winner: Skye Stack Highly Commended: Pamela Capriglione, Hiyed CIC
People’s Autism Hero of the Year Award Winner: Blaise Heywood Highly Commended: Jenny Robinson, Rose Connelly
Two of the judges actor Gary Webster and presenter and author Wendy Turner
Creative Arts and Media Award Winner: Curran Dobbs Highly Commended: Libby Barrett, Amaya Edwards
Support Group of the Year Award Winner: Kim Drake – Little Hero’s ASD Support Group
Personal Achievement Award Winner: Thomas Howard Highly Commended: Amaya Edwards, Kelsey McInearney
Online Social Network Award Winner: Daniel Jones
The star of the night Vega
Human-Animal Bond Award Winner: Philippa Jane Sjoberg & Scrumpy Highly Commended: Sarah Allen & Patsy, Bobby Clark & Zeus
The judges Steven Smith Samantha Lee Howe Brad Riches , Gary Webster with Anna Kennedy OBE
A Night of Emotional Speeches and Performances
The night was filled with heartfelt speeches from winners and nominees, many sharing personal stories of perseverance and triumph. One of the most touching moments came from Thomas Howard, who received the Personal Achievement Award for his relentless advocacy in making neurodiversity training mandatory in higher education. His emotional speech moved the audience, reinforcing the importance of awareness and inclusivity.
On hand celebrity magician Angus Baskerville entertained .
The Impact of the Autism Hero Awards
Events like these play a crucial role in breaking down barriers, fostering inclusion, and encouraging ongoing support for autistic individuals. Dr. Anna Kennedy OBE, the driving force behind the awards, delivered a passionate speech about the importance of community support, education, and advocacy. Her dedication continues to bring positive change and hope to countless individuals and families.
Looking Ahead
As the curtains closed on another successful Autism Hero Awards ceremony, attendees left inspired and determined. The event once again proved the importance of recognising and celebrating achievements within the autism community. With each passing year, the Autism Hero Awards grow stronger, touching more lives and expanding their reach.
Upcoming Event: Autism & Art Show
Anna Kennedy Online in Association with Firepit Art Gallery CIC Presents Their Inaugural 🎨 “AUTISM & ART SHOW” 🎨
VIP Red Carpet Launch: May 22nd, 2025 Exhibition Dates: May 22nd – May 27th, 2025
“For people on the autism spectrum, art is a powerful medium that encourages self-expression.”
Anna Kennedy Online, in collaboration with the Firepit Art Gallery, is proud to present the first-ever “Autism & Art Show.” This exciting event showcases incredible artwork from autistic artists and their allies, with all profits supporting the charity Anna Kennedy Online. Art is more than just a passion—it serves as a therapeutic outlet, offering solace and joy to many individuals on the autism spectrum.
Are you an artist on the autism spectrum or an ally who wishes to contribute? Donations of artwork or a percentage of sales are welcomed to support this meaningful cause. Showcase your work at one of London’s most vibrant galleries!
🎟 Get Your VIP Night Tickets Below! https://bit.ly/42Jo4OA (Other exhibition dates are free to attend, but donations to the charity are greatly appreciated.)
📍 Event Location: Firepit Art Gallery CIC Firepit Gallery No.2, Upper Riverside, 10 Cutter Ln, Ground Floor Unit, Greenwich Peninsula, London SE10 0XX
🔗 Learn More & Support the Charity
Chris Wilde one of the artist who work will be on show .
Having been a creator in the beauty industry before becoming a writer, my eagle eye is always on the latest hot products to keep us looking our very best.
As spring approaches, I thought it was the perfect time to share my top four picks that will bring out the best in you.
1. Enough Wellness Collagen – Created by Women for Women (But Men Can Use It Too!)
“Beauty comes from within.”
Enough Wellness Collagen is a highly effective supplement that combines 10,000mg of two types of high-quality bovine collagen with vitamins C and D to enhance absorption and maximize benefits. This targeted formula nourishes from within, making it an excellent addition to any beauty routine.
Why Collagen Matters
Collagen is a vital structural protein essential for maintaining the health and integrity of our skin, hair, nails, joints, and connective tissues. As we age, collagen production declines, leading to visible signs of aging such as sagging skin, weakened joints, and brittle hair and nails.
Adding a collagen supplement to your daily routine helps replenish these levels, promoting a youthful glow and overall well-being.
Premium-Quality Ingredients
Enough Wellness sources its hydrolyzed Swiss Bovine Collagen Peptides from grass-fed cows in Switzerland, ensuring purity and sustainability.
The formula is free from gluten, GMOs, artificial colors, flavors, fats, sugars, and carbs, providing essential support for: ✔ Radiant skin ✔ Strong hair and nails ✔ Flexible joints ✔ A healthy metabolism
Its neutral taste makes it incredibly versatile—you can add it to smoothies, water, juice, or even use it in baking. We loved it at 2SHADES!
2 Re[Sens] – A Game Changer for Redness-Prone Skin
It’s not often that I get truly excited about a new skincare range—after all, I’ve seen just about every potion and lotion on the market. But when leading skincare expert Iryna Stewart suggested that my Celtic skin redness could be tamed and calmed, I was all ears.
And she was right. Re[Sens] is a game-changer for those of us prone to redness or flushed-looking skin.
The Philosophy Behind Re[Sens]
Made in Ukraine, this brand is deeply rooted in ancient Ukrainian traditions, bringing them into the modern world through the symbolism of the circle—a concept inspired by Trypillian culture. This symbol represents the eternal cycle of time, regeneration, harmony, and the connection between nature and cosmic rhythms.
But Re[Sens] is more than just skincare. It’s about rethinking beauty—where high-quality, effective products are created with sustainability in mind.
Breaking Down the Name: Re[Sens]
🔹 RE – Represents a moment of rethinking skincare, where both the product and its packaging are designed without harming the planet. The brand emphasizes that the earth needs care just as much as our skin, and failing to consider this leads to a loss for everyone.
🔹 SENS – Derived from “senses” and “sensitivity”, reflecting both the needs of delicate skin and the emotional sensitivity of an individual. Re[Sens] acknowledges that every element of life affects our well-being, offering a 360° approach to skincare.
A New Standard in Beauty: Slow, Thoughtful, and Effective
Re[Sens] embraces the philosophy of Slow Beauty, which is built on the idea that more is not always better. Just as multitasking can lead to burnout, overwhelming the skin with too many ingredients can cause stress and irritation. Instead, Re[Sens] focuses on:
✔ Mindful consumption ✔ Achieving results without compromising skin health ✔ Ethical and sustainable skincare
Rather than overloading the skin, Re[Sens] provides a balanced blend of anti-inflammatory, moisturizing, and soothing ingredients, ensuring effective care without overstimulation.
For those looking to adopt a conscious, holistic approach to skincare—one that nurtures both the skin and the planet—Re[Sens] is a must-try.
🔗 Learn more here 15 percent discount with the code STEVEN2025
Creator of the pillow Tracey Wooley with aesthetic and beauty expert Clare McSweeney
3 The Fresh Face Pillow – The Ultimate Beauty Sleep Essential SS15 will give your audience 15% off
If there’s one beauty product I can’t stop raving about, it’s the Fresh Face Pillow—even Contessa Sharrock loves it! This clinically proven pillow is a game-changer in the fight against sleep-induced wrinkles and creases—something even the best creams can’t fix. And the best part? You only need to buy it once!
What Makes the Fresh Face Pillow So Special?
✔️ Clinically Proven – Backed by science to prevent sleep wrinkles ✔️ Silk Pillowcase – Gentle on skin and hair, reducing dryness, bedhead, and breakage ✔️ Memory Foam with Cooling Gel – Supports neck posture while keeping you cool all night
Why Silk Matters
Silk pillowcases offer more than just luxury—they actively protect your skin and hair. Unlike cotton, silk reduces friction and irritation, helping to prevent wrinkles, dryness, and breakage. It’s also hypoallergenic and temperature-regulating, ensuring a comfortable and restorative sleep.
Your Best Defense Against Aging
Did you know that most aging happens while you sleep? The Fresh Face Pillow is designed to protect your skin overnight, ensuring you wake up looking refreshed and youthful.
If you’re serious about skincare, beauty, and better sleep, this pillow is a must-have!
4 Watermans Red Light Mini Scalp Massager – A Game Changer for Hair Care
At 63 years young, I still get compliments on my hair, thanks to top colorist Heidi Gammon and my barber Mike Edde. While some of my mates are jetting off to Turkey for hair transplants, I have a secret weapon—Watermans shampoo and conditioners.
Now, they’ve introduced something even better—the Red Light Mini Scalp Massager. As someone who already swears by scalp massagers, I can confidently say that this new red light mini comb is an absolute game-changer.
Why You Need the Watermans Red Light Mini Scalp Massager
✔️ Boosts Hair Growth – Uses high-frequency vibrations and red light therapy to rejuvenate the scalp and encourage hair regrowth. ✔️ Enhances Serum & Oil Absorption – Designed to work with Watermans hair oil or serum, ensuring deeper penetration of nutrients for stronger, healthier hair. ✔️ Scientifically Proven – Red light therapy has been shown to combat hair loss and promote thicker, fuller hair. ✔️ Easy to Use – Simply squeeze the side pads to release oil or serum while the massager glides smoothly over the scalp. ✔️ Portable & USB-C Rechargeable – Take it anywhere—ideal for travel or home use.
How to Use for Maximum Hair Growth
1️⃣ Charge the Device – Ensure it’s fully charged for consistent performance. 2️⃣ Load with Oil or Serum – Use Watermans hair oil or serum for maximum benefits. 3️⃣ Activate Oil Release – Gently squeeze the pads to dispense product evenly. 4️⃣ Turn On & Massage – Select your desired setting and let the high-frequency vibrations & infrared light do the work. 5️⃣ Glide Over the Scalp – Use small, circular motions, focusing on thinning areas. 6️⃣ Relax & Enjoy – Feel the soothing effects as it stimulates blood circulation and nourishes the scalp. 7️⃣ Use Regularly – For the best results, use several times a week to see noticeable hair growth improvements.
Final Verdict
If you’re serious about scalp health and hair growth, this powerful yet easy-to-use device is a must-have. With its red light therapy, vibration technology, and precise serum application, it provides professional-level scalp rejuvenationat home. Plus, its compact, rechargeable design makes it perfect for on-the-go use.
💡 Whether you’re looking to prevent hair thinning or simply boost scalp circulation, this is the ultimate tool for vibrant, healthy hair!
There is nothing more terrifying for me personally than a visit to the dentist. For me, as is the case for many, the child-hood trauma from seeing the school dentist has lingered and has evolved into a type of phobia, now, in later life. Many people in the U.K. literally have to have their teeth practically falling out or need to be in excruciating pain before they dare to step over the threshold of the dreaded Dentist surgery.
My trauma undoubtedly derived from the school dentist and I can still visualise the gas mask coming towards me. In the ’60s, little empathy was shown towards a crying child.
But also, even in my adult life, my anxiety was heightened when being told by one desist “Stop moaning you’re a big guy this should be a doddle”. I felt like I was being tortured by some horrendous instrument like in a scene from the movie Saw. Furthermore, I have even been punched in the face accidentally, to add further insult to injury, when the dentist attempted to pull out a support as he rushed to complete my filling.
Have you ever noticed when the dentist accidentally stabs you with their scissors or one of their many sharp implements you often get the response “Oh your sensitive in that area?” Being honest, I find myself wanting to get up and grab the tool out of their hands to stick it in their bottom as he/she squeals, simply replying “Gosh you’re sensitive there!”
Having lived in the U.S. for nine years, I went to the same dentist and wonderful hygienist for the whole time, without any issues. Yes, it is true that the U.K. is now catching up with its dentistry counterparts, but we do lag behind in terms of the advancement of the technology and skills within dentistry in the U.S. It took me almost a decade to find a hygienist that matched the practice I used to attend in Los Angeles. ‘Nanny toothbrushes’ does not begin to describe some of the terrible experiences I have had in London. Naturally, the last dental disaster left me fervently searching for a new dentist, a bit like when you find a good hairdresser and do not want to lose them at any cost. The minute I hear “Do you drink coffee or tea?” from the mouth of the hygienist, I want out of there!
My poor departed friend, the brilliant journalist Lester Middlehurst, contracted Hepatitis B, apparently from a dentist in Brighton. It was ten years since he had been near a dentist at the time and he called me asking for a recommendation as he had read about ‘painless dentistry’ in a magazine. This process of being put to sleep for dental procedures had fast become popular in the U.S. and he admitted that the only way he was going to sit on a dentist chair, as if he could be put to sleep, even if it was just a cleaning his teeth required. The usually vivacious Mr. Middehurst did not even want to talk to a dentist receptionist as it gave him the shivers, but his teeth were beginning to rot and with his heavy smoking, his smile was starting to deteriorate.
Being in the world of beauty and fashion, it is easy to get recommendations for good dentists, but very few offered painless dentistry. In fact, a few seemed perplexed when I asked about this type of procedure.
Then…BINGO! I discovered Knightsbridge Dental Practice located in Beauchamp Place, one of the infamously chic streets in London. They do not advertise or have a social media presence, which inferred that they must have a very good reputation if word of mouth was what their business relied upon.
Even after finding them, it took another month to get poor Lester there and I had to tell a little lie that they put you out before they even looked at your teeth. I needn’t have worried as an imminent love affair between Roman Franks (one of the partners of the practice) and Lester started as he was put into a dream-like state, to repair the damage caused by many years of neglect.
Painless dentistry involves sedation to relieve any anxiety but it does not put you fully to sleep. It is undeniably a great benefit for those patients who suffer from anxiety in the dentist chair, though this can cost extra and regrettably, not all practices offer this service.
Up until this point, I had been waiting to make my bi-annual visits to the U.S. to go to the dentist. I was so impressed not only by the expert customer service but the wonderfully trained receptionist, at this clinic in particular, that I decided to try out the practice for myself. Senior partner, Alan Gold, fortunately, had an appointment which is rare and I have to admit, we clicked right away, particularly with him being a Geordie. He had a wicked sense of humour and appeared to genuinely listen to my own personal issues around anxiety and dentist visits.
Additionally, he was not selling me anything, whereas so many times, I have had consultations where I feel that they are simply trying to sell to me. I did need some work, however, and so he suggested attempting to do the procedure without sedation initially and seeing how I coped. Bless him, I am really not easy and having had bad experiences in the past, the slightest noise can set me off.
Alan’s clinic is beautiful and relaxing and there is a television above you to focus on, which takes your mind off what he is actually doing. It soon became clear, however, even with his immense skills, I would need to be sedated for most invasive procedures.
Now for those thinking of asking for sedation, you need to do this when you have time, as essentially you will need to go straight home and rest following the procedure and ideally you will need a friend to take you home as you may feel uninhibited and therefore need supervision.
Alan himself is a breath of fresh air, he jogs to work each day and has never had a single day off work sick, since launching the practice in 1975. He is an expert in cosmetic dentistry also, giving a running commentary on daily news issues whilst skilfully working on your teeth.
In 1970 Alan graduated from Newcastle University, training extensively in the very latest in dentistry. He took the SAAD (Society for the Advancement of Anaesthesia in Dentistry) course and has treated many thousands of phobic dental patients using intravenous and inhalation sedation techniques.
After Roman retired, Alan’s new partner, the very glamourous Avee-Marie joined the practice, an approachable, warm and gentle clinician. She qualified from the Kings College School of Medicine and Dentistry in 2000 and has been practising for nearly 17 years. She brings an advanced holistic feel to the already welcoming and professional team. Avee-Marie specialises in phobic patients.
Much as Alan is old school and has no interest in social media, Avee-Marie has managed to get the practice to ‘dip its toes’ into social media marketing.
Happy New Year! Let’s hope 2025 is a great year for us all. I’m busy with my team, as always. Among the many things we have lined up is The Autism Hero Awards, being held at the Holiday Inn, Regent’s Park, London on the 15th of March. You can find information on how to get tickets and sponsorship details at the bottom of this column.
As always, we also have the amazing Autism’s Got Talent later this year—audition tapes are welcome now!
In other news, our autism ambassador, Kieron Lee, is launching a neurodiverse musical education platform as his final major project for his BA (Hons) degree in Popular Music.
We’re also thrilled to announce that our patron, Steven Smith, along with the incredible Annemarie Bickerton, will be hosting the first-ever Autism Art Show, featuring artists on the autism spectrum and supporters of the charity. Money raised will go directly to the charity. This event will be held at the sensational gallery, The Fire Pit (https://www.firepit.art), from May 22 to May 25, 2025.
Dr Anna Kennedy OBE with one of her patrons Steven Smith ,
Please keep your questions coming into 2Shades magazine. I’ve been thrilled to join such a diverse and exciting publication!
Dear Anna, Trust you’re well. My family loves your column. We were wondering: What do you think are the most common myths about people living with autism?
Dawn, Essex.
Thank you, Dawn, for your kind comments. Sadly, there are still a lot of autism myths out there.
Here is five common ones
5 Myths and Facts About Autism
Myth 1: Autism is caused by vaccines.
Fact: There is no scientific evidence linking vaccines to autism. Numerous studies have thoroughly debunked this myth. Autism is believed to be influenced by a combination of genetic and environmental factors, but vaccines are not one of them.
Myth 2: People with autism lack empathy.
Fact: Many individuals with autism experience empathy deeply, but they may express it differently. Some may have difficulty recognizing social cues, but this does not mean they lack feelings or care for others.
Myth 3: Autism only affects children.
Fact: Autism is a lifelong condition. While symptoms might present differently as people age, autistic adults continue to experience challenges and strengths associated with autism throughout their lives.
Myth 4: Everyone with autism has the same abilities and challenges.
Fact: Autism is a spectrum, meaning it affects individuals differently. Some may have significant support needs, while others may live independently and excel in various fields. No two autistic people are alike.
Myth 5: Autism can be cured.
Fact: Autism is not a disease and does not need to be “cured.” The focus is on acceptance, support, and enabling autistic individuals to thrive by embracing their unique perspectives and abilities.
Would you like to dive deeper into any of these points?
Dear Anna, My daughter is being labelled disruptive at school. She’s been diagnosed with autism and severe learning difficulties. Despite discussing this with the headteacher, she’s suggested that Mary, my daughter, not return this term and instead find a school more suited to her needs. Anna, I feel lost—what can I do, or who can I turn to for help?
Diana, Essex
Dear Diana, I feel your frustration.
Please do contact our charity website using our contact form at http://www.annakennedyonline.com. We can discuss the possible way forward. In the meantime, do some research on schools that may meet your daughter’s needs within an hour’s drive of where you live.
You will then be in a more informed position on what is available in your area. You could visit a few schools to get a feel for the services and resources they offer.
Dear Anna, How does someone become part of Autism’s Got Talent? My son is super talented at playing guitar. He’s a little shy and unsure about auditioning. He’s also worried about encountering a harsh judge.
David, Edinburgh
Hello David, Autism’s Got Talent is now in its 14th year and one of the highlights of our charity year.
This is a showcase of talented individuals performing at The Mermaid Theatre, London. Autism’s Got Talent is not a competition.
Please do watch our highlight videos on our charity YouTube channel.
You could also come along to the show in October to experience the magic. Share the experience with the audience made up of parents, friends of the performers, and members of the public who are regular supporters. Feel the magic and be inspired. Then send a tape in of your son performing . love Anna
Autism’s Got Talent.
Dear Anna, My son is 19 and wants to start dating. He’s a lovely young man but has a stammer and lives with autism. I’m worried about how he’ll handle rejection. Is there a webpage or group where he can meet like-minded people?
Brenda, Norwich
Hello Brenda, There are many dating sites now for autistic individuals.
A popular Netflix docuseries, Love on the Spectrum, showcases autistic individuals navigating the world of dating. One of our charity’s overseas ambassadors is featured in series one and two.
In this romantic docuseries, people on the autism spectrum look for love and navigate the world of dating and relationships. https://www.netflix.com/gb/title/81338328
Good luck!
Dear Anna, I love your dancing! I’m 17 and want to learn to dance seriously. Living with autism has always made it feel challenging, but I’d like to get more involved. How did you learn?
Love, Melanie, Brighton
Hello Melanie, Dance is a great way to stay fit and boost your mood and well-being. I started tap dancing at age 6 and fell in love with dance then. It definitely keeps you feeling young.
Join a local dance class and discover which dance style suits you best. There are also many dance classes online if this makes you feel more comfortable at first, then gradually progress to a dance studio.
Good luck and enjoy!
Anna Kennedy with her former Dance Partner Robin Windsor
Happy Holidays. Can you help me? I have been seeing my boyfriend for a year now and we are in love. However, I have not introduced him to my family yet. One, he is very domineering (I like that) and never holds back on his opinions. Two, he is covered in tattoos, hates dressing up and he is a drummer in rock band part time. My mum is super conservative and just about down with me being gay. She actually says that no one with tattoos are welcome in her home. Mum rang the house, and he picked up and she invited him for Christmas!
HELP please!!
Mike, Kingston.
Oh bless Mike, talk about being put between a rock and hard place. First of all, you should have dealt with this months ago if you care for boyfriend and mum. You say mum is just about ok with you being gay. Well, it sounds to me like she is making the right moves inviting your partner for Christmas.
If your partner loves you, it is time to sit down and tell him the issues about your mum. You say you like the fact he is dominant and opinionated. There is a difference between that and a narcissist. You let him be himself 364 days a year, but maybe he could think about you for one day, not be a different person but just tone it down a little. If he really cares about you and is not a narcissist he will understand. Until mum gets to know him, box clever and make this day about realising that you need some TLC in this area. Trust me, if he really cares he will work with you. If he can’t, I’ll tell you something he is not dominant, he is just not caring.
Next time you chat to mum, maybe give her a little pre-warning he might not be joining the conservative club any day soon. Just do some groundwork preparation before the big day. Remember: life is short and you need to be happy. Mike, those that say they love you should want the best for you, sometimes that means compromise.
Happy Christmas my love, write and let me know how It goes.
Dear Heidi,
I like to party, but it is high days and low with me. Sheryl my fiancé loves it 24/7 but I am fine with that as she can go out with her gang, and I am not jealous or worried. We are having friends over for Christmas Day and we were going over the menu when she announced, “I’ll get a few grams in for after”. Honestly, I have had enough. The only White Christmas I want is on the ground. What do I say?
Lisa, Chiswick.
Oh no Lisa, oh I have seen this so many times. The marching powder is no-one’s friend. Yes, there seems to be a honeymoon period for many who think it makes them invisible but like any false high, in the end there is always a price to pay. It destroys jobs, relationships and friendships, not mention it robs your bank account. Once it gets its claws into you, for many there is no escape. Yes, there are those who partake on high and low days, who seem in control like yourself. But Sheryl sounds like she might be heading for a fall. You need to simply say no! That’s not the Christmas you want. Make your views clear and it might give her a shock, or maybe she’s already hooked and this is the bit she is looking forward to on Christmas day. Then she may need help, but time to realise it’s a slippery slope, and you being an enabler won’t end well .
Hello Heidi,
How are you, love the column. Now there is no excuse, but I kissed my best friend’s husband on a drunken outing when my bestie was away. It has been over six months I have not seen him or mentioned it to my friend. We are all spending Christmas together this year. I have not seen my friend’s husband since. It is going to be super awkward. What should I do? Maybe call him and chat about what happened?
Dylan, Brighton.
Sweetie, if it was just a kiss get over it. People are human and drink is horrible when it comes to making a fool of ourselves. Unless you’re not telling Heidi the whole story, move on and put it behind you. Or if the kiss meant more to you than you’re saying, maybe have word with yourself. He has not been in contact with you since the drunken kiss so perhaps he does not remember it. Take Heidi’s advice: do not do party postmortems and stop making a mountain out of a mole hill. Enjoy your Christmas xxx
Happy Holidays, Heidi
Dear Heidi,
My partner Alisha is just gorgeous and we’ve been together for six months. She came out as lesbian late in life, having been married for twenty years. She has two teenage kids and they are coming for Christmas. Heidi I am terrified. I do not do kids and how do I act? They are very important to Alisha.
Love Diana.
Hi Diana, it is not a couple of hyenas coming for Christmas, it is two teenagers (perhaps more terrifying at times). No Diana, can I tell you how to handle it? Be yourself, treat them with respect and take an interest in them, listen and you will be surprised. Please have some basic structure of your expectations to staying in your home as you would with anyone coming to stay. But do not come over like a prison guard. Just try and have fun; they will be as worried as you!
Glitz and glamour gathered in London on Thursday night for the launch of the coffee table photo book, BOLD.
BOLD features pictures of women who have lost their hair—80 percent of them due to treatment for breast cancer.
The venue for the launch, The House of Keune by Bloom Salon, was impossible to miss; it stood out like a beacon of light. A hair salon might seem like an unusual choice to launch a book about being bald, but as an ex-hairdresser, I can say it was the perfect place.
Ten years ago, I was featured in My Left Boob, the story of my dear friend, actress and socialite Sally Farmiloe-Neville, who I shaved her head, styled wigs, and helped grow her hair back.
The BOLD photo book is a powerful project that captures the beauty and resilience of women who have experienced hair loss due to breast cancer treatment, alopecia, or other conditions. The collaboration between the Pink Ribbon Foundation and Caroline Sikkenk Photography highlights the strength and femininity of these women through stunning portraits, offering a new perspective on beauty beyond hair.
Many of the women featured in the book were present at the launch, with their hair now grown back. The room was electric with love, laughter, and tears.
The photo book, with its high-quality presentation and 192 pages of artistic images, serves as a tribute to the courage of the women who participated. It’s also a meaningful way to support the Pink Ribbon Foundation, as all profits from the book’s sales go towards the charity’s efforts. Pre-orders are available now, offering a chance to own a piece of this empowering project while contributing to a vital cause.
The evening began with a chance to explore the BOLD exhibition, stylishly displayed around the salon’s shampoo area. It was an exciting atmosphere with celebrities such as Wendy Turner Webster (Pet Rescue), Dr. Anna Kennedy OBE, celebrity artist Piluca, and comedian Sarah Mulindwa joining the guests.
The real stars of the night were revealed as the guests sat down to listen to a panel headed by Lisa Allen and Dutch photographer Caroline Sikkenk. Models Lauren Plumb, Tricia Bailey, and Anais Muczynski, all from the iconic photo collection Bald and Beautiful, shared their stories of battling cancer with courage and great humor. The audience laughed, cried, and found inspiration in their stories. There was a standing ovation when Tricia shared her vocal talents and sang Sweet Caroline.
There wasn’t a dry eye in the house when a tribute was paid to one of the amazing models who is sadly no longer with us. Sally Franklin passed away after a recurrence of breast cancer, but her brave and supportive family was present to share their love and memories of this incredible woman.
Sally Franklin
Lisa hopes to take the panel and show to Scotland next, and we at 2 Shades salute her, her team, and the incredible women of BOLD.
Steven Smith looks at the affect addiction has on us all, how it can be so prolific among the LGBTQ And celebrity community, the often-misguided views people have about those living with addiction, and of course shares his own tale.
November 26th, 2010, the phone rang with news I had been expecting—my lifelong friend Lester Middlehurst, the witty, Machiavellian, and brilliant journalist was dead at 55. He had been in coma for days after a suspected suicide attempt.
I know how I was supposed to feel to the world. But putting down the phone, there was complete numbness followed by anger, and then an overwhelming relief that the man who had formerly been my friend, but had in later years become my tormenter was no longer. No more waking to drunken abusive messages, or being the brunt of his jokes or outburst at parties, and I’d no longer have to apologise to other people for his behaviour towards them.
Lester in his prime
Lester Middlehurst was one of the first openly gay staff members at The Daily Mail. He was legendary. At the coroner’s inquest it turned out he had not killed himself, rather his death certificate said that he died of a hypoxic brain damage attack. Everyone agreed it was his addictive lifestyle that killed him.
Sadness
Lester was one the most addicted people that I have ever met, and he was my friend and I loved him. A month later I must have spent a day crying over him. The sadness was really that he never got help for his addiction, and you could say that my lack of knowledge of it prevented me from helping him…but that would be romanticising a terrible situation.
Back in 2009 I got him to agree to attend the Meadows Clinic in Arizona, but the next day he told me not to be so stupid. In truth, I did not feel strong enough to stand up to him. As my knowledge about addiction has grown, I have become more aware that there was nothing I could have done unless Lester had wanted to do anything about it.
According to the Centre of Addiction, members of the LGBTQ community are at greater risk of substance use and mental health issues compared to those identifying as heterosexual.
Members of the LGBTQ community face chronically high levels of stress, often due to having to suffer from social prejudice and discrimination. Fear, isolation, and depression increase the chances of self-medicating with alcohol and drugs. As a man that has lived a life in big cities, I have witnessed addiction in all classes and types of people. Addiction is a mistress that does not care who she dances with, yet the LGBTQ community are often her favourite partners.
As the self-confessed addict, actor Russell Brand explains that the distinction of any compulsive or addictive behaviour is when it begins to negatively impact on the rest of your life.
Compulsive
So, you might love chocolate so much that you’ll ignore all logical reasoning, “I have to have chocolate…I have to have chocolate…I don’t care what else happens”. If you’re crashing your car because of chocolate, that’s a problem.
According to Wikipedia, addiction is a brain disorder characterised by compulsive engagement in a rewarding stimulation despite adverse consequences.
Of course, addiction is certainly an illness and not a lifestyle choice, and if we are honest, addiction is in all of us in some way or another.
For me, I just can’t not buy a large French baguette, cut a few slices off, and put it back for later. I end up devouring the whole thing. Subsequently, I do not buy French baguettes unless I am feeling poorly. Whether it’s chocolate, coffee, or your favourite tipple, we all have cravings.
Russell Brand
Much as Russell Brand is right, there are so-called functioning addicts who you would not even realise are hooked on their drug of choice, and it can take many years for the effects to begin to show. Often referred to as “high functioning addicts” owing to their having powerful jobs or enough money to effectively hide their addiction from others. This knocks on the head the commonly presented image of an addict being down-and-out or living on the streets. According to the American Psychiatric Association, there is no such thing…they are all just addicts who have created coping mechanisms.
My father, God rest his soul, came home after holding down a high-powered job and drank whisky every day of his life, yet he would be horrified at the idea of being described as an addict. But when he left hospital after lung cancer removal surgery, he sat down and demanded, “Get me a whisky and a cigarette.” On the suggestion that was not a good idea and that he would end up back in hospital, he snapped “Are you threatening me?”
Growing up, I was told that an addict was someone who got up and drank first thing. Drinking after coming home from work and weekends was seen as normal for many in the 60s and through to the 90s. All of our soaps were featured around a pub, making alcohol look like a socially acceptable way of life.
I had a volatile relationship with my dad, but his fight with cancer gave me a better understanding of the nature of his addiction and where it had come from. He had been a talented jazz trumpeter and played with the BBC orchestra, but his nerves had come to the forefront and he started to self-medicate by having a few whiskies before his shows. Eventually, he gave up and started a family, but the drinking did not stop.
Charismatic
My father adored my best pal who also fights addiction, and is a truly remarkable human being who I was fortunate to love, and my dad did not like many people. The two were like two peas in a pod and talked for ages.
Spending time with my dad before he died made me wonder whether, if he had managed to overcome obvious anxiety and continued playing, perhaps he would have been happier. Of course, back then mental health was seen by many as a weakness and not to be spoken about.
My world has been filled with people who are addicts in one form or another. They are the most charismatic and amazing people and the arts are full of them. In my opinion, they all have one thing in common—they can snap and become almost frightening at the drop of a hat, and then suddenly they are wonderful and make you feel like you mean the world when they are OK. Sadly, during my childhood there was more of the former with my dad. Though I knew in the end that he loved me.
There are so many people living with addiction, anxiety, and mental health issues who are in denial. Even with all the help groups and open discussions there seems to be a quite a bit of stigma attached to it still.
Dr Pam Spurr, a popular self-help expert and radio television personality, says she often encounters people who are in denial about their issues that are the source of their addiction problems. They say things like “I just have a little problem with confidence” which ignores the fact that they drink excessively to help make them feel more confident. Or they say, “I only drink after work to take the edge off.” But when they count up the units, they are far in excess of government guidelines. It’s at times like these that I encourage them to think honestly about their drinking (or drug taking) and consider expert advice.
Many addicts get clean either by joining the 12-step programme, by checking into rehab, or by seeking counselling. The journey of recovery can be different and what works for one person might not work for another person. It is important to point out that as much as the newspapers show pictures of celebrities dashing off to glamorous-looking rehabs, getting into a state-run rehab in the UK can be very difficult for mere mortals.
While helping a friend who was using OxyContin (a pain killer) and had got into a mess from ordering online and then become addicted, the general health services did not want to know. Even going through other channels, she was advised that her chances of getting into rehab were slim, although she did come away from it with a strong network of friends around her.
A beautiful girlfriend of mine found her sobriety in a man as her anchor who was also living with addiction. They have both been clean for seven years now.
Living in LA, the 12 steppers (12 step programme) were like the mafia, and rumour had it that all the best movie deals were done at their meetings and also that many there did not have addiction issues and instead just wanted to pitch ideas.
There is no doubt that the 12-step programme helps many, and even if the meetings can become the new addiction it’s a healthy one.
I agree with Doctor Pam that it is amazing how much of a lack of understanding there is about addiction.
Cake
My gorgeous bubbly friend Monica is originally from California. She is a super bright academic having gone to Yale, lectured all over the world, and she also ran a school for a while.
Yet three years ago she decided to open an up-market catering company as her award-winning chef sister is a goddess in the business. People actually beg for invites to try her canapés.
Lunch with Monica is always fun—it starts off with “Darling shall we share a cake after?” Despite being gorgeous, she is always on some kind of diet. Her little addiction would be cake.
Like one or two other intellectuals I have met with qualifications coming out of every orifice, their life skills sometimes leave me speechless. Despite having a gay brother, she once commented on a photo shoot involving five men I had directed “Is the man with his foot up against the wall a sign he is gay?” I replied “No darling, there are no secret signs; it’s a James Dean inspired clothing shoot.” She just smiled and continued eating.
Today, however, she was on the warpath. She was catering for a big party we had worked on together to get celebrities at. One of the celebs had behaved inappropriately to some of the other guests and to a couple of waitresses.
She was not amused when I laughed, “Well darling, at least he did not get his cock out and try and pee in the champagne fountain like at my other friend’s launch. How that did not end up in the papers is beyond me.” I got the school ma’am look.
He was living with addiction – not surprising considering his childhood trauma and the abuse he lived with. He really should not have been drinking. I am not excusing him, but it’s not the end of the world that I did not invite him to the next few. I said that I’d have a word. Her eyes got wider, and she seemed shocked that I had empathy with the celebrity at all. She wanted him banned for life.
Taboo
As much as I have some reservations about the 12-step programme, saying you’re sorry to those you may have hurt is not easy to do, but it sometimes isn’t enough. I started talking about addiction, and a few minutes in it was clear that it was going nowhere, even though I was sharing this with someone highly intelligent.
Addiction remains a taboo subject. There are so many people in denial and as much as the newspapers are full of celebrity headlines about them being addicted, most of us don’t want to talk about it or feel labelled by it.
A year ago my phone rang—it was a friend who had come out of family day at a rehab centre that her daughter was attending. She was fuming that they suggested that it may run in the family, “They had better not be blaming this on me. I have no addiction.” She was not amused when I laughed “It’s not about you and I will remind you of that next time you refuse to come home from the bar or spend two weeks obsessing about something.”
Outside those who are counsellors, therapists, and those who talk openly about their addiction and some of their loved ones, I have found very few people who understand those living with addiction.
A very wise woman, author, presenter, and journalist, Jane Moore was one person who seemed to understand it. Lester and Jane were great friends and the two together were hysterical. Yet Lester had gone on a tirade about her and I was mortified since she was a true loyal friend to him, and he was starting to run out of friends due to his behaviour.
Lester Middlehurst and Jane Moore
While ringing her and offering full apologies asking her not to fall out with him, she calmly said, “I could never be offended by Lester. He is hurting too much, but he’s lucky to have a friend in you.”
At the time I just thought, but I wish if I had taken those words more to heart I might not have taken his behaviour personally and got as hurt as I did in the end. It helped later in life as I saw the pain addiction brings too.
The LGBTQ community have learnt to talk more as we have needed to be heard to survive. Most surveys say that a larger proportion of those identifying drug and alcohol use as a coping mechanism are LGBTQ, but I beg to differ.
I have sat in many restaurants and bars in London watching the city boys and their entourage go back and forth to the toilets, passing each other along the way. I am pretty sure they are not the kind found in the survey.
Addiction is a worldwide human crisis according to the World Drug Report. Unless we start talking about it, spotting the signs at an early age, and treating it as an illness, many will die with all the new and powerful drugs flooding the market. Whole towns have been wiped out in the US due to drug addiction.
Chemsex is the consumption of drugs to facilitate sexual activity. Both terms refer to a subculture of recreational drug users who engage in high-risk sexual activities under the influence of drugs within groups. Chemsex parties are said to be prolific on the London gay scene, but that is a different story. Not wanting to be righteous, I have no experience of it or want to engage in it. Recent reports in the gay press say chemsex parties are held across UK, but there is a correlation between addiction and sex shame.
The perfect storm
Sadly no longer with us David Stewart of 56 Dean Street, an award-winning HIV and sexual health clinic in the heart of London, explains that this trend is driven by a convergence of factors: “Vulnerable gay men with issues around sex, new drugs that tapped into that problem and changing technology. What they call the perfect storm.”
There was enough of a problem for the government to lay out guidelines in 2017.
Actress Danielle Westbrook, who I have interviewed many a time, put it simply to me, “Look Steve, you get ten people at a party and they all try coke for the first time. Four never try it again, four have it once in a blue moon, and two poor things are addicted six months later.”
The answer would be to never take the risk, but human nature is never that simple.
My friend Lester will never come back but it led me to have so much more of an understanding of addiction and how to protect myself around addiction. Many of the world’s beautiful people are soldiers fighting addiction every day of their lives.
Steven Smith looks at the affect addiction has on us all, how it can be so prolific among the LGBTQ community, the often-misguided views people have about those living with addiction, and of course shares his own tale.
November 26th, 2010, the phone rang with news I had been expecting—my lifelong friend Lester Middlehurst, the witty, Machiavellian, and brilliant journalist was dead at 55. He had been in coma for days after a suspected suicide attempt.
I know how I was supposed to feel to the world. But putting down the phone, there was complete numbness followed by anger, and then an overwhelming relief that the man who had formerly been my friend, but had in later years become my tormenter was no longer. No more waking to drunken abusive messages, or being the brunt of his jokes or outburst at parties, and I’d no longer have to apologise to other people for his behaviour towards them.
Lester in his prime
Lester Middlehurst was one of the first openly gay staff members at The Daily Mail. He was legendary. At the coroner’s inquest it turned out he had not killed himself, rather his death certificate said that he died of a hypoxic brain damage attack. Everyone agreed it was his addictive lifestyle that killed him.
Sadness
Lester was one the most addicted people that I have ever met, and he was my friend and I loved him. A month later I must have spent a day crying over him. The sadness was really that he never got help for his addiction, and you could say that my lack of knowledge of it prevented me from helping him…but that would be romanticising a terrible situation.
Back in 2009 I got him to agree to attend the Meadows Clinic in Arizona, but the next day he told me not to be so stupid. In truth, I did not feel strong enough to stand up to him. As my knowledge about addiction has grown, I have become more aware that there was nothing I could have done unless Lester had wanted to do anything about it.
According to the Centre of Addiction, members of the LGBTQ community are at greater risk of substance use and mental health issues compared to those identifying as heterosexual.
Members of the LGBTQ community face chronically high levels of stress, often due to having to suffer from social prejudice and discrimination. Fear, isolation, and depression increase the chances of self-medicating with alcohol and drugs. As a man that has lived a life in big cities, I have witnessed addiction in all classes and types of people. Addiction is a mistress that does not care who she dances with, yet the LGBTQ community are often her favourite partners.
As the self-confessed addict, actor Russell Brand explains that the distinction of any compulsive or addictive behaviour is when it begins to negatively impact on the rest of your life.
Compulsive
So, you might love chocolate so much that you’ll ignore all logical reasoning, “I have to have chocolate…I have to have chocolate…I don’t care what else happens”. If you’re crashing your car because of chocolate, that’s a problem.
According to Wikipedia, addiction is a brain disorder characterised by compulsive engagement in a rewarding stimulation despite adverse consequences.
Of course, addiction is certainly an illness and not a lifestyle choice, and if we are honest, addiction is in all of us in some way or another.
For me, I just can’t not buy a large French baguette, cut a few slices off, and put it back for later. I end up devouring the whole thing. Subsequently, I do not buy French baguettes unless I am feeling poorly. Whether it’s chocolate, coffee, or your favourite tipple, we all have cravings.
Russell Brand
Much as Russell Brand is right, there are so-called functioning addicts who you would not even realise are hooked on their drug of choice, and it can take many years for the effects to begin to show. Often referred to as “high functioning addicts” owing to their having powerful jobs or enough money to effectively hide their addiction from others. This knocks on the head the commonly presented image of an addict being down-and-out or living on the streets. According to the American Psychiatric Association, there is no such thing…they are all just addicts who have created coping mechanisms.
My father, God rest his soul, came home after holding down a high-powered job and drank whisky every day of his life, yet he would be horrified at the idea of being described as an addict. But when he left hospital after lung cancer removal surgery, he sat down and demanded, “Get me a whisky and a cigarette.” On the suggestion that was not a good idea and that he would end up back in hospital, he snapped “Are you threatening me?”
Growing up, I was told that an addict was someone who got up and drank first thing. Drinking after coming home from work and weekends was seen as normal for many in the 60s and through to the 90s. All of our soaps were featured around a pub, making alcohol look like a socially acceptable way of life.
I had a volatile relationship with my dad, but his fight with cancer gave me a better understanding of the nature of his addiction and where it had come from. He had been a talented jazz trumpeter and played with the BBC orchestra, but his nerves had come to the forefront and he started to self-medicate by having a few whiskies before his shows. Eventually, he gave up and started a family, but the drinking did not stop.
Charismatic
My father adored my best pal who also fights addiction, and is a truly remarkable human being who I was fortunate to love, and my dad did not like many people. The two were like two peas in a pod and talked for ages.
Spending time with my dad before he died made me wonder whether, if he had managed to overcome obvious anxiety and continued playing, perhaps he would have been happier. Of course, back then mental health was seen by many as a weakness and not to be spoken about.
My world has been filled with people who are addicts in one form or another. They are the most charismatic and amazing people and the arts are full of them. In my opinion, they all have one thing in common—they can snap and become almost frightening at the drop of a hat, and then suddenly they are wonderful and make you feel like you mean the world when they are OK. Sadly, during my childhood there was more of the former with my dad. Though I knew in the end that he loved me.
There are so many people living with addiction, anxiety, and mental health issues who are in denial. Even with all the help groups and open discussions there seems to be a quite a bit of stigma attached to it still.
Dr Pam Spurr, a popular self-help expert and radio television personality, says she often encounters people who are in denial about their issues that are the source of their addiction problems. They say things like “I just have a little problem with confidence” which ignores the fact that they drink excessively to help make them feel more confident. Or they say, “I only drink after work to take the edge off.” But when they count up the units, they are far in excess of government guidelines. It’s at times like these that I encourage them to think honestly about their drinking (or drug taking) and consider expert advice.
Dr Pam
Many addicts get clean either by joining the 12-step programme, by checking into rehab, or by seeking counselling. The journey of recovery can be different and what works for one person might not work for another person. It is important to point out that as much as the newspapers show pictures of celebrities dashing off to glamorous-looking rehabs, getting into a state-run rehab in the UK can be very difficult for mere mortals.
While helping a friend who was using OxyContin (a pain killer) and had got into a mess from ordering online and then become addicted, the general health services did not want to know. Even going through other channels, she was advised that her chances of getting into rehab were slim, although she did come away from it with a strong network of friends around her.
A beautiful girlfriend of mine found her sobriety in a man as her anchor who was also living with addiction. They have both been clean for seven years now.
Living in LA, the 12 steppers (12 step programme) were like the mafia, and rumour had it that all the best movie deals were done at their meetings and also that many there did not have addiction issues and instead just wanted to pitch ideas.
There is no doubt that the 12-step programme helps many, and even if the meetings can become the new addiction it’s a healthy one.
I agree with Doctor Pam that it is amazing how much of a lack of understanding there is about addiction.
Cake
My gorgeous bubbly friend Monica is originally from California. She is a super bright academic having gone to Yale, lectured all over the world, and she also ran a school for a while.
Yet three years ago she decided to open an up-market catering company as her award-winning chef sister is a goddess in the business. People actually beg for invites to try her canapés.
Lunch with Monica is always fun—it starts off with “Darling shall we share a cake after?” Despite being gorgeous, she is always on some kind of diet. Her little addiction would be cake.
Like one or two other intellectuals I have met with qualifications coming out of every orifice, their life skills sometimes leave me speechless. Despite having a gay brother, she once commented on a photo shoot involving five men I had directed “Is the man with his foot up against the wall a sign he is gay?” I replied “No darling, there are no secret signs; it’s a James Dean inspired clothing shoot.” She just smiled and continued eating.
Today, however, she was on the warpath. She was catering for a big party we had worked on together to get celebrities at. One of the celebs had behaved inappropriately to some of the other guests and to a couple of waitresses.
She was not amused when I laughed, “Well darling, at least he did not get his cock out and try and pee in the champagne fountain like at my other friend’s launch. How that did not end up in the papers is beyond me.” I got the school ma’am look.
He was living with addiction – not surprising considering his childhood trauma and the abuse he lived with. He really should not have been drinking. I am not excusing him, but it’s not the end of the world that I did not invite him to the next few. I said that I’d have a word. Her eyes got wider, and she seemed shocked that I had empathy with the celebrity at all. She wanted him banned for life.
Taboo
As much as I have some reservations about the 12-step programme, saying you’re sorry to those you may have hurt is not easy to do, but it sometimes isn’t enough. I started talking about addiction, and a few minutes in it was clear that it was going nowhere, even though I was sharing this with someone highly intelligent.
Addiction remains a taboo subject. There are so many people in denial and as much as the newspapers are full of celebrity headlines about them being addicted, most of us don’t want to talk about it or feel labelled by it.
A year ago my phone rang—it was a friend who had come out of family day at a rehab centre that her daughter was attending. She was fuming that they suggested that it may run in the family, “They had better not be blaming this on me. I have no addiction.” She was not amused when I laughed “It’s not about you and I will remind you of that next time you refuse to come home from the bar or spend two weeks obsessing about something.”
Outside those who are counsellors, therapists, and those who talk openly about their addiction and some of their loved ones, I have found very few people who understand those living with addiction.
A very wise woman, author, presenter, and journalist, Jane Moore was one person who seemed to understand it. Lester and Jane were great friends and the two together were hysterical. Yet Lester had gone on a tirade about her and I was mortified since she was a true loyal friend to him, and he was starting to run out of friends due to his behaviour.
Lester Middlehurst and Jane Moore
While ringing her and offering full apologies asking her not to fall out with him, she calmly said, “I could never be offended by Lester. He is hurting too much, but he’s lucky to have a friend in you.”
At the time I just thought, but I wish if I had taken those words more to heart I might not have taken his behaviour personally and got as hurt as I did in the end. It helped later in life as I saw the pain addiction brings too.
The LGBTQ community have learnt to talk more as we have needed to be heard to survive. Most surveys say that a larger proportion of those identifying drug and alcohol use as a coping mechanism are LGBTQ, but I beg to differ.
I have sat in many restaurants and bars in London watching the city boys and their entourage go back and forth to the toilets, passing each other along the way. I am pretty sure they are not the kind found in the survey.
Addiction is a worldwide human crisis according to the World Drug Report. Unless we start talking about it, spotting the signs at an early age, and treating it as an illness, many will die with all the new and powerful drugs flooding the market. Whole towns have been wiped out in the US due to drug addiction.
Chemsex is the consumption of drugs to facilitate sexual activity. Both terms refer to a subculture of recreational drug users who engage in high-risk sexual activities under the influence of drugs within groups. Chemsex parties are said to be prolific on the London gay scene, but that is a different story. Not wanting to be righteous, I have no experience of it or want to engage in it. Recent reports in the gay press say chemsex parties are held across UK, but there is a correlation between addiction and sex shame.
The perfect storm
David Stewart of 56 Dean Street, an award-winning HIV and sexual health clinic in the heart of London, explains that this trend is driven by a convergence of factors: “Vulnerable gay men with issues around sex, new drugs that tapped into that problem and changing technology. What they call the perfect storm.”
There was enough of a problem for the government to lay out guidelines in 2017.
Actress Danielle Westbrook, who I have interviewed many a time, put it simply to me, “Look Steve, you get ten people at a party and they all try coke for the first time. Four never try it again, four have it once in a blue moon, and two poor things are addicted six months later.”
The answer would be to never take the risk, but human nature is never that simple.
My friend Lester will never come back but it led me to have so much more of an understanding of addiction and how to protect myself around addiction. Many of the world’s beautiful people are soldiers fighting addiction every day of their lives.
Mike Edde with one of the many celebrity clients Eammon Holmes
When it comes to woman’s hair if you need a brand new hair style it really is worth paying top dollar to get the best attention and idea’s to create a new you.
But often with a trim round the bottom you can get the same result with out robbing the bank at your local salon just do not expect a cappuccino , five minute head rub at the back wash and latest recommendations to the top spots in town you would get in the really high-end Salons.
However, when it comes to men’s hair, I gave up years ago getting my friends to cut my locks. It took too long and they never really did what I wanted except for the brilliant Martyne Fletcher who used to tend the late Joanne Rivers.
I gravitated to going to Sassoon’s who really never once made me happy and other high end Salon often leaving feeling robbed at £50 -£80 for a trim. One day I was just about to give up when saw a man in the gym who’s hair I liked so following my own advise I asked where he had it cut. “Mike the Barbers ” he replied. A local men’s shop that I had seen but would never dream of trusting my blond do to a shop a barbers.
I actually stood outside for three or four minutes to get up the nerve to go in, before asking for Mike, a dashing bubbly local legend in Earl’s Court. For sure there was not cappuccino in sight and no head rub, in fact unless you request it they do not wash your hair, as I more than often had to take the brush off the stylists in the high end salons and dry it myself so it was no loss to me.
Mike in his shop in Earl’s Court is legendary
Unlike many Sassoon people I noticed they where experts with razor’s and thinning scissors. I told Mike what i wanted and he asked if I would like the harsh line softened a bit, it had always bugged me that they could not soften it. Always ended up with a server wedge or fire fly. With in 15 minutes for the first time in years I loved my hair and did not need to grow a bit back or wish it had been cut shorter.
Even better it was £11, I get it cut every two weeks now to keep it neat and I go with out worrying it will be yet another disappointment . Mike has been doing my hair for six years and every fella I recommend goes again and again and one or two short hair ladies love him too. You never know who you will bump into Wayne Sleep might just come pirouetting by or one of the many celeb clients that know the secret.
Now colouring is another thing only to go high-end.
For the last five years I have been feeling tired, sluggish and just not myself.
Often in the afternoon, despite a hectic schedule, the need to lie down would be almost overwhelming. Flu-like symptoms with abdominal pains are a regular occurrence in my life.
My G.P. put it all down to having had glandular fever in my early thirties, and told me it was something I just had to live with.
Whilst in India, I met Doctor Prakash, who suggested a visit to his Harley Street clinic to undertake his anti ageing treatment would help. Both of us having such busy schedules, however, it was almost a year before I found myself sitting in stylish office.
The first thing he suggested was that I had some blood work done to check my hormone levels and look at various other health areas. Having had more blood tests than I care to remember – all of which pointed to my glandular fever – I was a little sceptical and the prospect of yet another test did not thrill me. But there was nothing to it and it only took a few minutes.
A week later I was back for the first of my results. Mr Prakash has a kindly air about him but I could see he seemed a little concerned. ” My goodness,” he said, “you are so stressed out. I have never seen a result like it.” I immediately came out in a cold sweat, fearing I had only weeks to live!
But to my relief – and on only my second visit Mr Prakash – he had got to the root of my problem. I had Adrenal Fatigue, brought on by not coping with stress. My cortisone level, which drives the stress gland and protects the body against its ill-effects, was one of the lowest he had ever seen. Despite my sunny disposition, and determinedly looking on the bright side, I was slowly collapsing under the weight of stress inside.
Mr Prakash prescribed Adrenplus – 300, a mix of vitamins and Adrenal supplement, and said I should take one a day. He also advised me on a new diet and suggested I do more resistance exercise. But his Meditation and yoga would help with this, and help me learn to relax. “You have been too busy looking after everyone else, Steven, it’s time to look after your body,” he told me.
He went on to explain that my body was like a kettle, but there was no putting vitamin supplements or medication in if the sides of the kettle were not well and truly sealed, as everything would just fall out. The sides on my kettle were wide open because of stress and only relaxation and breathing would help me seal it.
Five days later, I’ve been doing meditation tapes, taking my supplements and following my diet (BELOW ) . I am a long way from feeling like I did in my twenties but, just three days into Dr Prakash’s regime, I’ve found that, for the first time in years, I’ve not felt the need to take an afternoon nap.
Breakfast
Tea – green tea or ginger and lemon tea. Make your own with fresh lemon and peeled ginger
Omelette made with the whites of four eggs. Add vegetables of choice. Cook in a small amount of olive oil (no butter)
Fruit – a cup of fruit such as blueberry, pomegranate, coconut, grapefruit. Avoid high-sugar oranges, tangerines and strawberries.
Alternate with organic full fat yoghurt. Avoid low or zero fat yoghurt.
Snack
An hour or so later, have a snack, such as a handful of almonds, macadamia or cashew nuts, pomegranate, coconut shavings or blueberries.
Lunch
Tuna salad or chicken breast salad. If the tuna is tinned, make sure it is in spring water rather than oil. For the salad, spinach, watercress, spring onions, beetroot and celery. Use lemon as dressing or a tablespoon of Udo’s oil.
Snack
The afternoon snack can be the same as the morning. If you have worked out, have a protein drink with added water rather than milk, unless it is almond milk, or blueberry blended in almond milk.
Dinner
Chicken or turkey breast with a small portion of brown rice; steamed broccoli with added ginger if desired, or lightly stir fried vegetables.
It is important not to eat after seven in the evening but if you want you can have some cherries before sleep with a small cup of warm almond milk.
2Shades Magazine 
